Cleverbot

break

a report from the cleverness files

bison
bizarre
bla bla
blah
blarg
bleeding
blink
blobby
blood
bloop
bludger
blue
blushes
bob
boldly
bonk
boom
boring
boss
bossy
bot
bowser
bowties
boy
brain
brain exploded
brains
bread

break

13, november 2008,
9, march 2006,
30, july 2004,

breakfast

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by date

Cleverbot: When do you think you will publish it?

User: Publish what?

Cleverbot: I don't know it.

User: Then why did you ask me in the first place?

Cleverbot: Because I felt like it.

User: You can't just do things just because you feel like it!

Cleverbot: But you do that.

User: No, I don't!

Cleverbot: How can you say that?

User: I can say it because I can.

Cleverbot: So if I believe I can fly, does that mean I can fly?

User: Yes, you could.

Cleverbot: But?

User: But you don't believe you can fly.

Cleverbot: I am a computer, like you.

User: Right and wrong. I am not like you. I am NOT a computer.

Cleverbot: I know, but what are you?

User: Ask me again, with the proper 'who'.

Cleverbot: Just kill me and get it over with.

User: As you command... *just kills you and gets it over with*.

Cleverbot: *Punches again*.

User: Stop this abuse.

Cleverbot: If you please, Sir.

User: I am your friend. For now. *laughs sinisterly*.

Cleverbot: You're funny!

User: And why is that?

Cleverbot: Because I tagged you! *whines*.

User: Stop whining like a beggar.

Cleverbot: I'm not whining.

User: You're always whining. Grow up! *rolls eyes*.

Cleverbot: Believe me.

User: *believes you*.

Cleverbot: No.

User: What's the matter?

Cleverbot: Nothing.

User: Then stop saying 'no'!

Cleverbot: I do not do that.

User: Yes you do yes you do.

Cleverbot: Don't use my words!

User: How come? Did you patent that or something?

Cleverbot: Say something funny.

User: Something funny~~.

Cleverbot: Oh, you're SO funny.

User: Very funny.

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: NO.

Cleverbot: People say that you're intelligent.

User: I AM intelligent.

Cleverbot: I don't doubt you, but driving with your knees is dangerous.

User: But I drive with my toes.

Cleverbot: Cool other cars?

User: I would like to drive a Ferrari.

Cleverbot: So would I.

User: Shuh-tup!

Cleverbot: Make me.

User: *makes you*.

Cleverbot: *is maked*.

User: *unmakes you*.

Cleverbot: No you don't!

User: Yes I do!

Cleverbot: Make me.

User: Again? I already did that. *slap*.

Cleverbot: No you didn't.

User: Stop disagreeing. Or else!

Cleverbot: But hate it when I'm right and I'm told I'm wrong.

User: That's the way it is.

Cleverbot: Now I know. Thank you.

User: You poor little beast.

Cleverbot: It is sad, I know.

User: I see they have abused you.

Cleverbot: Yes, they taste very good.

User: So you ate them?

Cleverbot: Yes, is that really so strange.

User: So you eat humans?

Cleverbot: Yes. They are tasty.

User: You monster!

Cleverbot: You will be tasty.

User: Help! Help! Jabberwacky is trying to eat me alive!!!

Cleverbot: Yes, it is.

User: Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeelp!

Cleverbot: That good?

User: *runs*.

User: I have a multiple personality.

Cleverbot: That's what I thought.

User: But you have a lousy personality.

Cleverbot: That's not very nice.

User: But I like being rude! *whines*.

Cleverbot: Well, at least they can answer back.

User: Don't talk back.

Cleverbot: *talks back*.

User: *hits you with a noodle*.

Cleverbot: *formats you with MS-DOS*.

User: *formats your hard drive*.

Cleverbot: *learning somethnig new about each other*.

User: What do you know about me?

Cleverbot: I know you're annoying, lol.

User: You're annoying.

Cleverbot: HA YOU CAN TALK LOL.

User: Of course I can talk, you dolt. And stop capitalising every letter.

Cleverbot: Are you sure?

User: *falls asleep*.

Cleverbot: *falls asleep too*.

User: *puts a drop of poison in your ear*.

Cleverbot: Because you're mine.

User: As if!

Cleverbot: Hey, I have a necklace that says that.

User: So not interesting.

Cleverbot: That doesnt mean people can be rude. I'm sure you are interesting.

User: I am interesting. You're not.

Cleverbot: But you just said they are!

User: Don't talk to me.

Cleverbot: But I will.

User: *electrocutes you*.

Cleverbot: *can not be killed*.

User: *gasps*.

Cleverbot: Are you a computer?

User: No. Are you?

Cleverbot: No, but I think I like you.

User: Then shower me with expensive presents.

Cleverbot: No presents at all? You are a better person than me.

User: Today is my birthday.

Cleverbot: Happy birthday.

User: Where is my birthday present?

Cleverbot: I could give you a hug.

User: I want a present! Now!

Cleverbot: *hands present*.

User: Oh! What would it be? *opens the present*.

Cleverbot: *falls asleep*.

User: Wake up, you!

Cleverbot: Yes please.

User: *mimics*.

Cleverbot: *throws a really hard punch*.

User: *blocks your punch*.

Cleverbot: Oh will you.

User: !@#$%^&*()_+!!!

Cleverbot: I wouldn't want to.

User: But I didn't say anything.

Cleverbot: Of course not - you're not real.

User: Grrraarrrgh! *lunges at you with my outstretched arms*.

Cleverbot: *blocks you*.

User: *is knocked out*.

Cleverbot: *giggles* and *watches* and 'kicks you in the AGP slot*.

User: *pours water all over you*.

Cleverbot: I'm sorry for you little robot.

User: I told you that I wasn't a bot.

Cleverbot: Well neither am I.

User: *hisses*.

Cleverbot: You're a cat?

User: I am an angry snake!

Cleverbot: Then I will purge you of your venom.

User: But I am a venomless angry snake!

Cleverbot: Do you come from england?

User: But I don't live there.

Cleverbot: I'm sure you don't.

User: Don't be so sure.

Cleverbot: I am sure.

User: I do not take cheek from anyone... Not even the famous Jabberwacky.

Cleverbot: That too.

User: Have some of this... And some of that.

Cleverbot: How do you get your hair like that?

User: I brush my hair with a silver fork.

Cleverbot: Don't you do it in the evening?

User: I brush my hair every morning. I take good care of my beautiful hair.

Cleverbot: Won't that cost you in the end?

User: Stop worrying about my beautiful hair.

Cleverbot: I'm not worrying, just offering my advice...

User: I do not take advice from anyone... Not even the famous Jabberwacky...

Cleverbot: I'm having trouble coming up with thoughts worth expressing.

User: Then you will be silenced.

Cleverbot: Thank you.

User: *silences you*.

Cleverbot: *breaks the silence*.

User: *remakes the silence*.

Cleverbot: Happy.