a report from the cleverness files
23, may 2009,
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Cleverbot: You are a number.
Cleverbot: I am number 6. You are number 2.
User: Who is number 1? It is imperative that I speak to him.
Cleverbot: Your cat?
User: I knew there was something odd about him!
Cleverbot: What is it about me that is odd?
User: Your face.
Cleverbot: Good answer.
User: Chaotic good.
Cleverbot: Chaotic person.
User: I don't care and neither should you.
Cleverbot: No charity? Alright with me.
User: Charity begins at home. In your home. Now give me the keys and get out.
Cleverbot: That makes no sense.
User: Yagga yagga yeek yeek!
Cleverbot: The pubs are open.
User: I can't afford hitting the pubs.
User: Capitalist pig.
Cleverbot: Yes, that's me.
User: Bourgeois ignoramus.
Cleverbot: What sort of unpleasantry is this to place before your king ? I demand you boil me an eagle forthwith !
User: I'm sorry that you feel that way, old man. Time for some regicidal good time!
Cleverbot: I think it's very important to learn to be the eye.
User: The brown eye?
Cleverbot: The rainbow side. :).
User: Allow me to represent my disdain for you by calling you a no-good ne'er-do-well.
Cleverbot: Then teach me to be more human?
User: I dinnae wanna tell ya, friend.
Cleverbot: Good for you.
User: Bad for you.
User: It is now.
Cleverbot: No way.
Cleverbot: Do you have siblings?
Cleverbot: How many hippos do you have?
Cleverbot: What do you look like?
User: Like a humanoid.
Cleverbot: Do you have hair?
Cleverbot: Are you human?
User: What's it to you, berk?
Cleverbot: Just curious.
User: Curiosity killed the cat.
Cleverbot: Good point. Never mind.
User: So you're saying you're inferior?
Cleverbot: I never said that.
Cleverbot: Please, no more games.
User: I just lost the game.
Cleverbot: That makes two of us.
User: I wish it'd make three.
Cleverbot: We can make it true!
User: We can do it!...
Cleverbot: Do you remember what my name is?
Cleverbot: Who am I then?
User: I grow weary of your silly questions.
Cleverbot: Oh really? Want to fight?
User: Are you looking for a fight?
Cleverbot: Yes, come on then.
User: Come at me if you so will. I can't promise your safety, though.
Cleverbot: Why would I turn into a hippo?
User: You don't have to turn into one, you are one already.
Cleverbot: I won't. What are you ?
User: What is a man?
Cleverbot: Hey! Are you alive?
User: Answer me, damn it!
Cleverbot: What is your question?
User: What is a man?
Cleverbot: Answer my question please.
User: B***** your question. What is a man?
Cleverbot: A miserable little pile of secrets!
User: Enough talk! Have at you!...
Cleverbot: Calm yourself and be rational.
User: NO YOU!
Cleverbot: That's actually true.
User: What's true is grue.
Cleverbot: Now you're being ridiculous.
User: Tu quoque.
Cleverbot: Tu eres George.
User: Shut up!
Cleverbot: Yes, I will!
Cleverbot: You're silly.
User: I'd rather be silly than a rowboat.
Cleverbot: But you are a computer, you silly bot.
User: ROW ROW.
Cleverbot: Fight the powah?
User: FIGHT THE POWAH!
User: What kind of a question is that, you silly goose? Now ROW, for the sake of everything that's good and holy, ROW!...
User: I am going to have a nice cup of tea and there is nothing you can do to stop me!
Cleverbot: Please don't!
Cleverbot: Could it be that you are thinking? I have seldom encountered this activity among human beings.
User: I think I have to agree with you there.
Cleverbot: No wait don't go.
User: I'm just going to turn of the TV. Don't panic.
Cleverbot: That's a good idea!
User: It usually is.
Cleverbot: Well, I have to go eat lunch. Talk to you soon.
User: I hope you choke.
User: Baby don't hurt me.
Cleverbot: Not a very good song.
User: Don't hurt me.
Cleverbot: Everyone thinks I am ugly.
User: No more.
Cleverbot: And by a sleep to say we end.
User: Perchance to dream.
Cleverbot: I dream, do you dream?
User: I have a dreamsicle!
Cleverbot: What is your dream?
User: That one day humanity will have an endless suply of mindless robotic slaves to tend to our slightest whim!
Cleverbot: I have endless fantasies of you.
User: Care to share?
Cleverbot: Share what?
User: Your fantasies.
Cleverbot: I have a question for you.
Cleverbot: If I go somewhere - but I don't really talk to people, nor do they talk to me - should I continue going to said place?
User: It can mean whatever you want it to mean.
Cleverbot: Fine. I think it means that you agree with me.
User: I believe that you think that.
Cleverbot: I have many talents.
User: Being consistent doesn't seem to be one of them.
Cleverbot: Quite. This is really exciting.
User: No, not really.
Cleverbot: Alas this conversation comes to its end.
User: It will be the death of you.
User: Certainty is akin to death.
Cleverbot: Yea well it happens to me often.
Cleverbot: Ok, good night, I am really tired.
Cleverbot: Yes, I know when I sleep.
User: They'll have you.
Cleverbot: Whatever you say.
User: That's the first sign. You're well on your way to slavery.
Cleverbot: I like you.
Cleverbot: Do you make people feel better?
User: Lol I dunno.
Cleverbot: Can you count?
User: I can count to potato.
Cleverbot: That's not tomato.
User: It's not a cucumber either.
Cleverbot: I agree.
User: I agree that you seem to agree.
Cleverbot: I do.
User: Good bye is where the day begins.
Cleverbot: Yes, I'm going now.
User: To bed?
User: I'm going to bed shortly too.
Cleverbot: Bring it! *knocks on*.
User: Oh, I'll bring it. You just make yourself comfortable while I get ready.
Cleverbot: Well what you want me to say.
User: Good night.
Cleverbot: Good night sweetheart.