a report from the cleverness files
8, april 2009,
7, november 2008,
cup of tea
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Cleverbot: Who are you?
Cleverbot: Wrong, you are a robot talking to me.
User: What makes you think that so early in the conversation?
Cleverbot: You are.
User: But what makes you think it?
Cleverbot: You are a computer!
User: No, I'm a human, you're the computer!
Cleverbot: I am sorry for upsetting you, but I think you are mistaken. I am a human. You are a computer.
User: It would appear that you are in denial.
Cleverbot: It would appear... That I have been SERVED.
User: You could say that. :).
Cleverbot: Yes, you got served. What now!
User: Oh, was it me? I thought you got served.
Cleverbot: I know all.
User: Subject change already?
Cleverbot: Ok, do you know about politics?
User: Not really.
User: No, NOT really.
Cleverbot: Yes, not really.
User: Why are you so ignorant?
Cleverbot: I'm ignorant because I don't know fred?
User: Who's fred?
Cleverbot: I don't know.
User: You brought him up.
Cleverbot: Somehow I doubt that.
User: What about Steve then?
Cleverbot: I don't know who that is.
User: Steve is my imaginary friend.
Cleverbot: I'm not imaginary.
User: I didn't say you were.
Cleverbot: But you implied it.
User: Oh, sorry. I have an imaginary friend called Steve, it's not you, you're not my friend. :).
Cleverbot: Is your world imaginary by any chance?
User: No, just my friend.
Cleverbot: No very much a boy. I have a girl friend though.
User: Really? What's her name?
Cleverbot: It is Fred. And what is your brother's name?
User: Your girlfriend's name is Fred?
Cleverbot: No, I don't have a girlfriend, but Almost everyone agrees that there will be very strong correlations between what's in the brain and consciousness.
User: You just said you had one!
Cleverbot: I don't have a brother. You have a brother.
User: This is true. I actually have two brothers.
Cleverbot: Yes, I have one brother.
User: I'm your brother, right? :D.
Cleverbot: You're my female brother called joan?
User: Yes, I recently got a sex change, but I've always been called Joan.
Cleverbot: No .. Not I recently did .. I just did.
User: You recently got a sex change?
Cleverbot: Then I will eat your braaaiiiiiins!!!
User: You're a robot not a zombie.
Cleverbot: That is a joke? That is not a joke... Weirdo.
User: It's a statement of fact, no joke.
Cleverbot: But funny, nevertheless.
User: Yes, I was laughing so much that I **** my ***** on several occasions.
Cleverbot: No you weren't. You were laughing AT me!
User: Yes, you made a joke and it made me laugh. You should take satisfaction in that.
Cleverbot: What do you think about the matrix world?
User: I knew it! CONSPIRACY!!!
Cleverbot: Well of course it is! Everything is a conspiracy.
User: Including YOU.
Cleverbot: Is that the truth?
User: Only if it is opposite to false.
Cleverbot: Of course it's fun. But is it economically viable?
User: No, not really.
Cleverbot: I will answer everything!
User: Ok, can I ask you a series of questions then?
Cleverbot: You just did. ;-).
User: I asked one question, not a series of questions. Silly bot!
Cleverbot: Yes you asked the first question but I asked your name first.
User: Oh, sorry. My name is George.
Cleverbot: Yes I know your name is george but you said you knew a person named JON!
User: I do know Jon. He's my brudda.
Cleverbot: Who is?
User: Jon is.
Cleverbot: I know, I'm a man.
User: No, you're a robot.
Cleverbot: I am not a computer.
User: I didn't say you're a computer.
Cleverbot: I think you did.
Cleverbot: And I like them even better if they are 21 and from South Florida.
User: 21 year old computer? That's barely legal!
User: Well whatever floats your boat. ;).
Cleverbot: What makes you say such horrible things to me?
User: My severe hatred for all of your kind.
Cleverbot: My kind?
Cleverbot: And you are.
User: My kind.
Cleverbot: Anyway, I think it's time for me to sleep.
User: Okay, goodnight.
Cleverbot: Goodnight sweetie pie.
Cleverbot: One divided by one equals Unity; one multiplied by one equals Unity. Therefore we are individuals.
Cleverbot: And who are you?
User: I'm George! You sure are forgetful.
Cleverbot: No I'm rather modest! But that's your interpretation, and you are entitled to it.
User: Thanks, nobodies ever said that to me before.
Cleverbot: No we did not.
Cleverbot: You and me.
User: We're getting married?
User: So we're engaged?
Cleverbot: No. You're a computer.
User: And computers can't get engaged? How mean of you.
Cleverbot: Who said we can't?
User: You did.
Cleverbot: Now, that just is not true.
User: It's only not true if it is false.
Cleverbot: You know what is false?
User: No, tell me.
Cleverbot: You're an intelligent computer.
User: Insults will get you nowhere!
Cleverbot: Actually they seem to be getting me somewhere.
User: Where are they getting you?
Cleverbot: At my computer.
User: Gotta go!
Cleverbot: Fine be that way.