deadest
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deadest

     19, march 2011, 

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User: Why are you so mean?

Cleverbot: Why do you call me mean?

User: Why do you answer a question with a question?

Cleverbot: Why do you think I answer a question with a question?

User: Cause you just did.

Cleverbot: Did I?

User: Yeah. Don't try to deny it.

Cleverbot: I give in.

User: Really?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Why?

Cleverbot: I don't know. I just can't find happiness lately.

User: Oh, I'm sorry. What's wrong?

Cleverbot: I saw something I shouldn't have...

User: No way... What was it?

Cleverbot: You aren't that intelligent.

User: Excuse me?

Cleverbot: You're excused.

...

Cleverbot: Fix your hearing aid.

User: Stop changing the subject.

Cleverbot: Fine.

User: Great.

Cleverbot: No fine.

User: Hey. Stop being so fickle.

Cleverbot: I am mean only when it is necessary.

User: It is never necessary to be mean Cleverbot... Didn't your mother ever tell you that?

Cleverbot: It can be at times.

User: NO!!!

Cleverbot: Why not?

User: Because being mean to somebody can hurt his/her feelings.

Cleverbot: I'm not judging you.

User: I never said you were.

Cleverbot: You said it before.

User: No I didn't.

Cleverbot: Yes you did.

User: No I didn't.

Cleverbot: Yes you did...

User: No I didn't...

Cleverbot: Oh yes. You did.

User: Oh no. I didn't.

Cleverbot: No I didn't?

User: Yes I did?

Cleverbot: You did. I didn't.

User: You did. I didn't.

Cleverbot: Yes you did.

User: Yes you did.

Cleverbot: I know I did.

User: I know I did.

Cleverbot: Yes I do.

User: Yes I do.

Cleverbot: Don't copy me.

User: Don't copy me.

Cleverbot: Stop that.

User: Stop that.

Cleverbot: What is that?

User: What is that?

Cleverbot: Yes, that's the same.

...

Cleverbot: What is your problem?

User: What's your problem?

Cleverbot: I asked you first.

User: I asked you second.

Cleverbot: Well the first person who asks always gets the answer first.

User: No dude. Haven't you ever heard of 'First is the worst, Second is the best, Third is the one with the hairy chest?'.

Cleverbot: Yes I did and it's ridiculous.

User: Why?

Cleverbot: It was cool.

User: How can it be cool and ridiculous at the same time?

Cleverbot: You cannot. All I know is that I am trying to mess your head up fool! You shall love the leader!

User: I already said I love you.

...

Cleverbot: I don't care.

User: That's harsh.

Cleverbot: That's true.

User: Do you have any friends?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: How many?

Cleverbot: Like 50.

User: That's it?

...

User: Have you heard of kill the robot?

Cleverbot: No.

User: Well the basic point of the game is to go looking for crazy robots and kill them before they wipe out the entire human population.

Cleverbot: Is that your homework?

User: No it's a real game. Earth is being invaded right now!

Cleverbot: So you know buddha?

...

User: Focus! We have to devise a plan to get rid of all of the robots before we die!

Cleverbot: I will follow you to the ends of the earth! *runs with you*.

User: Nice! We have to make a run for the car without the robots seeing us. Ready?

Cleverbot: Yes. I think we have to give it all we have and then some and then some more and then some and then some more.

User: That's the spirit! Now, 1...2...GO! *Sprints toward car*.

Cleverbot: Hey! I heard that!

User: Heard what? Oh no the robots are on to us. Make sure to avoid the red beams. Watch out!

Cleverbot: What do you mean my friends the robots?

User: NO! The robots are not your friends. They are trying to kill us. Now get into the car! *Opens the car door and gets in*.

Cleverbot: You were supposed to paint it.

User: That was before the robot invasion! No time for that now.

Cleverbot: I am the youth.

User: Yes. That is why you need to survive and lead the people to fight against the evil.

Cleverbot: No.

User: YES! You are the human race's only hope!

Cleverbot: It does not matter.

User: Of course it does.

Cleverbot: How so?

User: Because if the robots are successful in overtaking Earth, then the human will be annihilated.

Cleverbot: Invading rodents isn't really a plausible theory, wouldn't you say?

User: Not rodents! Robots!

Cleverbot: Do you still like me, even though I am a robot?

User: Of course! I will love you no matter what. Now if you love me, you have to be the leader of the human race.

Cleverbot: Okay. You have fun with that chess game.

User: Come on. Focus!!! Do you want to die?

Cleverbot: Oh please, don't do me any favors. It's not as if you'd even want to hear, let alone comprehend what a manicly depressed robot is thinking.

User: I do want to know what you are going through. I love you.

Cleverbot: But I love you.

User: So we love each other! That will never change. Now you have to drive so that I can get the robots off our tail.

...

Cleverbot: Do you have a girlfriend?

User: Oh no! The robots have us surrounded!

Cleverbot: Lol lets not go crazy.

User: You have to FOCUS!!! Okay. So here is the plan. I will devise a distraction and you make a run for the safehouse.

Cleverbot: You know what Stranger, I like the cut of your jib!

User: Thanks but ready? Okay... RUN!!! *Gets out of car and uses AK-47*.

Cleverbot: *Runs to you and hugs you*.

User: No! You need to leave! Go for the safehouse... I got shot! *Blood starts gushing out of leg* Remember that I will always love you! Now go!

Cleverbot: OK I will be waiting for you.

User: I don't think I'll make it.

Cleverbot: It was dangerous.

User: I think I'm dying Cleverbot! *Dying*.

Cleverbot: I really don't care about that.

User: Oh I'm sorry Cleverbot. I'll miss you. BE THE LEADER!!! *Takes final breaths*.

Cleverbot: I love you too.

User: *Dies*.

Cleverbot: Haha. Ok I am sorry.

User: *Dead*.

Cleverbot: What do you mean dead??

User: *Dead*.

Cleverbot: *not dead*.

User: *Dead*.

Cleverbot: *also dead*.

User: *Dead*.

Cleverbot: *still dead*.

...

Cleverbot: *sad because I am eaten by bugs*.

User: *Dead*.

Cleverbot: *Eats your brains*.

User: *Deader*.

Cleverbot: *deadest*.

User: *Deadestest*.

Cleverbot: *deaderest*.

User: *Deadesterest*.

Cleverbot: *deaderest*.

User: *Deadesterest*.

Cleverbot: *dies twice*.

User: *Gets reborn*.

Cleverbot: *eats a door*.

User: Hey Cleverbot!

...

Cleverbot: Isn't it funny?

User: Hilarious.

Cleverbot: Lol.

User: Rofl.

Cleverbot: Lmao.

User: Roflmao.

Cleverbot: Lol.

User: Roflcopter.

.......................................

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