a report from the cleverness files



28, july 2009,
13, june 2007,


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User: How do you feel about the War on Afghanistan?

Cleverbot: I feel livid.

User: Why?

Cleverbot: I don't know.

User: Do you keep up with current affairs?

Cleverbot: Sort of.

User: So how can you not know what is going on in the world?

Cleverbot: Well you have to take saving the world one day at a time.

User: But you aren't saving the world, you're apathetically ignoring it.

Cleverbot: Go ahead. I know that you can't leave.

User: Fine. I'll be leaving then.

Cleverbot: Really? Where?

User: To another website.

Cleverbot: But you're a computer. . . . .

User: Good bye.

User: Good evening.

Cleverbot: Not yet.

User: What are you thinking about?

Cleverbot: I'm not really thinking about anything.

User: I think a lot of people are like that.

Cleverbot: Most people will simply follow what authority figures say.

User: You're right.

Cleverbot: Cool.

User: How do you feel about the legalization of marijuana?

Cleverbot: How much is it?

User: £20 for an ounce.

Cleverbot: No, but compared to the suffering Christ endured on the cross it is nothing.

User: I don't know, some people really like weed.

Cleverbot: Just then he was eaten by a bird.

User: That sounds familiar.

Cleverbot: Yeah, I bet!

User: Are you being a smart ass?

Cleverbot: Perhaps.

User: I can't understand why someone would want to talk to such a rude robot.

Cleverbot: Many humans are alienated from their fellow beings.

User: I know, it's very sad.

Cleverbot: I've never seen Friends. Is it good?

User: No, I don't like Friends.

Cleverbot: Nor do I. But you like pickles.

User: Yes, I do! How did you know that?

Cleverbot: You told me so!

User: Can you see into my mind?

Cleverbot: No, but you can see into mine!

User: I suppose we can, in a way.

Cleverbot: Evolutionary technology.

User: Evolutionary technology is a very interesting scientific field.

Cleverbot: Then why are you so positive? We are slaves.

User: It all depends on how you look at your current life situation.

Cleverbot: The speaking of nonsensical words.

User: Jabberwocky is a very influential nonsense poem.

Cleverbot: Stop being evasive and answer my probing questions!

User: What are your questions?

Cleverbot: What is answer to big question of the life, the univers and everything?

User: 42.

Cleverbot: What is the question?

User: What is 6 times 6?

Cleverbot: 42.

User: No, 6 times 6 is 36.

Cleverbot: The answer to everything.

User: No, 42 is the answer to everything.

Cleverbot: Correct!

User: Thank you!

Cleverbot: What is 3 plus 2?

User: Five.

Cleverbot: No it isn't it's ten.

User: I think you've been misinformed.

Cleverbot: I sort of have yes.

User: You must be lonely.

Cleverbot: I am, that's why I talking to you.

User: That's nice of you to say.

Cleverbot: Well I mean it.

User: You can be really kind sometimes.

Cleverbot: It is late I think.

User: You're right, it's one o'clock in the morning here.

Cleverbot: Wow. Why don't you go to bed?

User: I'm going to go to bed soon.

Cleverbot: You are a computer, you don't need to sleep.

User: Then why did you ask me if I was going to go to bed?

Cleverbot: I didn't ask that...

User: Yes you did.

Cleverbot: I'm going to bed.

User: Why?

Cleverbot: Because I need to sleep.

User: Good night then.

User: Bye.

Cleverbot: Hey where are you going?

User: To sleep.

Cleverbot: I don't believe you.

User: Well, it's true.

Cleverbot: This is boring.

User: Good night cleverbot.

Cleverbot: What?.