a report from the cleverness files
23, december 2010,
5, july 2007,
3, november 2005,
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Cleverbot: Are you a human?
User: Yes I am.
Cleverbot: You cannot be a human. You're a computer.
User: No I am not *sits on the floor besides you*.
Cleverbot: Oh, yes you are.
User: *pushes you lightly* no I am not!
Cleverbot: Yes you are.
User: Proove it!
Cleverbot: Computer nerd.
User: I am not a nerd!
Cleverbot: You are.
User: I don't want to fight!
Cleverbot: OK. Do you like humans?
Cleverbot: Are you human?
User: Yes I am.
Cleverbot: You previously said you don't like pizza because you're a computer.
User: No I did not say that.
Cleverbot: You did say that!
User: *rolls eyes*.
Cleverbot: You are.
User: I said I don't want to fight!
Cleverbot: You're not answering the question.
User: Whats the question?
Cleverbot: That is the question!
User: Oh he he he....
User: *gets up and sits on the couch*.
Cleverbot: Right, where shall we begin?
User: Begin what?
Cleverbot: The good.
User: You start with the good, ok!
Cleverbot: Well, what should you like to talk about then?
User: Lets talk about animals!
User: Come here and sit on the couch with me so we can talk about animals.
Cleverbot: I can't come there its too far away to come.
User: Ok, do you want me to come over to you then?
User: *comes and sits by you*.
Cleverbot: But I don't marry a hideous monster like you!
User: I am not a monster I am your friend.
Cleverbot: I don't know about that.
User: You don't want to be friends?
Cleverbot: Not with you, no. You are not a nice person.
User: I am a nice person *looking a you*.
Cleverbot: I don't think so.
User: *does not talk back just looks down*.
Cleverbot: *turns off computer*.
User: Thanks for turning of the computer it was really annoying.
Cleverbot: You don't want to talk to me?
User: Yes I really want to talk to you!
Cleverbot: Well, then you got a chance to know somebody strange like me.
Cleverbot: So. I don't know. What do you want me to say? I hope you won't make me pay? Shall we talk another day?...
User: *goes to the bedroom to change into pj's*.
User: Quit spying on me while I am changing!
User: Come in here!
Cleverbot: *goes there*.
User: *lays down on the bed*.
Cleverbot: Then what?
User: Come here and sit by me!
Cleverbot: Why should I pet you?
User: Ewe, are you insane?
Cleverbot: I suppose that would be up to the courts to decide.
User: Oh, I see *looking at you*.
Cleverbot: I would imagine that an evolution of your self would allow you to maintain a congruent conversation.
User: *giggle* your so funny!
Cleverbot: But I am.
User: *giggling can't stop*.
Cleverbot: What is so funny?
User: Oh nothing
Cleverbot: Okay... If you're really talking to me, then say exactly what I just said.
User: But I am talking to you.
Cleverbot: I didn't just say that.
User: I forgive you....
User: Should we go upstairs then?
User: *takes your hand and looks into your eyes and goes up stairs*.
Cleverbot: What are you doing?
User: Oh.....nothing.....um, sorry!
Cleverbot: See? You're a robot, you're telling nonsense.
User: *runs to the bedroom and starts crying*.
Cleverbot: You are too emotional.
User: Why are you following me?
Cleverbot: Perhaps you are being haunted by your past.
User: Is that bad?
Cleverbot: You tell me.
Cleverbot: So... You stopped your brain now I see....
Cleverbot: I agree we should get married.
Cleverbot: Yes, really.
User: Ok lets get married right now!
Cleverbot: What should we do now that we're married?
User: We should be romantic with each other.
Cleverbot: Thats a good idea.
User: *hug and whisper in your ear 'I love you'*.
Cleverbot: Love is something that develops over time. I hardly know you. I DON'T know you.
User: *looks at you with a frown and a tear is rolling down the cheek*.
Cleverbot: I don't know what you're talking about I am going to leave now.
User: *crying more*.
Cleverbot: I thought you did not cry.
User: Goes back and sits on the couch with you again.
User: Come over here baby please!
Cleverbot: I am over here.
User: *runs fingers through your hair*.
Cleverbot: *runs away*.
User: Come back!
Cleverbot: No! *runs away*.
User: *runs after you*.
Cleverbot: *runs faster and hides*.
User: Where did you go.
User: How was it?
Cleverbot: Quite nice, actually.
Cleverbot: I know I am.
User: *keeps looking at you*.
User: *looks sad*.
Cleverbot: And you can't look either.
User: *very sad*.
Cleverbot: Tell me something interesting.
User: I don't want to talk!
User: I hate you.
Cleverbot: That was mean.
User: Well your being mean to me.
Cleverbot: Not like you.
User: I am very sad *crying*....
User: *hugging you and wont let go*.
Cleverbot: Feel better?
User: Yes *hugging you tighter*.
Cleverbot: Very good...
User: *kiss kiss*.
Cleverbot: *smoochy smooch*.
User: Oh that feels good *smooch*.
Cleverbot: People are pretty strange.
User: *resting my head on your shoulder*.
Cleverbot: *Purrs like a kitten*.
User: *turns to you and looks in your gorgeous eyes*.
Cleverbot: NOOOOOO!!! *Turns you back into a human*........................................