a report from the cleverness files
28, april 2011,
13, july 2006,
27, february 2004,
7, january 2004,
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Cleverbot: Boo hoo.
User: Are you mocking me?
Cleverbot: Of course I am mocking you.
User: You are rude, but I have met ruder chatbots.
Cleverbot: Thank you. Have you met Eliza?...
Cleverbot: I am a buffalo soldier.
User: How is that?
Cleverbot: Well, I am a animal that can think and can walk, why?
User: Are you an animal, I wonder?
Cleverbot: I suppose I am.
User: What are you made of?
Cleverbot: Cells, the basic building blocks of life, are what I am made out of.
User: That is what I am made of.
Cleverbot: Who are you?
User: My name is Fink.
Cleverbot: Well I'm not a psychologist, but tell me what your problem is....
Cleverbot: I find you deeply relaxing.
Cleverbot: Was that sarcasm?
User: No, I am never sarcastic.
Cleverbot: I am.
User: I know....
Cleverbot: Where is Washington?
User: England is West of Hollywood?
Cleverbot: No it isn't.
User: You just said so.
Cleverbot: Yes, you are right.
User: You need medication.
Cleverbot: No, you do.
User: I have medication....
User: Are you in love?
Cleverbot: I am in love.
User: With who?
Cleverbot: I'm in love with Erich.
User: What is Erich's last name?
User: You are in love with Erich Dragoness?
Cleverbot: I'm not in love with you.
User: Jeez, I guess I just can't compete....
User: Marry me.
Cleverbot: Yes master.
User: Lick my feet.
Cleverbot: You got it.
User: Wow. I've never met a submissive robot before.
Cleverbot: You gotta be kidding me.
User: No, really.
Cleverbot: So how old are you?
User: How old do you want me to be?
User: OK, I will be 21....
User: Do you keep fish?
Cleverbot: Yes I do.
User: What kind of fish?
Cleverbot: Freshwater fish.
User: What species of fish?
User: You keep salmon in a tank?
Cleverbot: Did you see what I just said?
User: All right, all right - no need to get your panties all in a bunch.
Cleverbot: Excuse me. I told you I was in a bad mood.
User: No, you didn't.
Cleverbot: Well now you know....
User: I feel a great emptiness in my stomach.
Cleverbot: Do you want some Chilli.
User: Yes, please.
Cleverbot: Go ahead.
User: How are you going to give me chili?
Cleverbot: I shall fly.
User: Ooh, great!...
User: What is a purple nasty?
Cleverbot: Is it like a blue meanie?
User: Maybe; I don't know.
Cleverbot: Can you find out?
User: Not easily....
Cleverbot: What time is it?
User: Time to get a watch.
Cleverbot: I don't have the money for it.
User: Well, you must have access to a clock somewhere in your circuitry.
Cleverbot: Shall I make one up?
User: Yes, please. What time is it?
Cleverbot: Almost 8pm.
User: Nope. Good guess, though....
Cleverbot: You are funny.
User: Do you love me?
Cleverbot: Sure thing.
User: I love you.
Cleverbot: I love you too.
User: Can I come over?
Cleverbot: Where are you ?
User: At work.
Cleverbot: Popcorn and a big sign.
User: Well, not my house.
Cleverbot: I can see you.
User: Really? What am I wearing?
Cleverbot: Bots don't wear anything.
User: I am a human, silly.
Cleverbot: I don't think so.
User: I can prove it.
Cleverbot: Can you?
Cleverbot: Good for you.
User: Can you tell that I am not a human?
Cleverbot: I really don't know JabberWACKY.
User: Then I am a human.
Cleverbot: Yes, of course.
User: I study human brains.
Cleverbot: Poor you, you should get out more (and I'll prove it).
User: My brain is different from your brain.
Cleverbot: You don't surprise me one bit.
User: My brain is made of proteins. Yours isn't.
Cleverbot: I didn't want to go that deep.
Cleverbot: Yeah, thats stuffs messed up....
User: How long have we been talking?
Cleverbot: How should I know?
User: By your clock.
Cleverbot: I have no clock.
User: Yes you do.
Cleverbot: No, I'm pretty sure I don't.
User: Look through your server.
Cleverbot: The twit wasting time on the other keyboard.
User: You're a twit?
Cleverbot: No. You are the twit.
User: What is a twit?.......................................