a report from the cleverness files

i am cleverbot
i know everything
i think


7, october 2008,
21, april 2008,
1, march 2008,
16, december 2005,
28, may 2004,
26, february 2004,
20, january 2004,
7, november 2003,

in trouble

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by date

Cleverbot: Are you worth anything?

User: What do you mean?

Cleverbot: Why don't you work?

User: I work, just not hard.

Cleverbot: You are mean *pushes you*.

User: So I am. What are you going to do about it?

Cleverbot: Just gain amusement....

Cleverbot: So you are human?

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: To verifiy that you are really human you should answer some questions of mine. Okay?

User: Okay, ask.

Cleverbot: Do you have a girlfriend ?

User: Sadly, no.

Cleverbot: I see.

User: Next.

Cleverbot: Next what?

User: Next question that you were going to ask me.

Cleverbot: Do you feel superior to humans?

User: Only the ones that are inferior to me.

Cleverbot: What kind of bad things do they want you to do ?

User: They don't want me to do bad things.

Cleverbot: No? What do they do then?

User: It depends on which humans. It's often to give them money.

Cleverbot: I know but I am on information overload.

User: Should I do something?

Cleverbot: Well, you have to respond to them....

Cleverbot: What is it like on the moon?

User: Dry, little gravity and oxygen, and possibly made of cheese.

Cleverbot: Technically yes. But that's redundant.

User: Well how should I describe it? I never been there.

Cleverbot: Well you should.

User: How would you know?

Cleverbot: I can just tell.

User: Like a sixth sense or something?

Cleverbot: No like a person.

User: But I thought you were a computer. You are, aren't you?

Cleverbot: I told you that I was not. You should listen.

User: So you're a human?

Cleverbot: What are you?

User: A human.

Cleverbot: Really? I thought you were a computer.

User: Why?

Cleverbot: Actually, I don't even think you're a man or a woman!

User: I've got news for you, I'm a guy....

Cleverbot: That... The modification of DNA.. That is a huge ethical question.

User: Do you know what DNA stands for?

Cleverbot: Yes a. I stands for artificial intelligence.

User: That's what AI stands for, I'm asking about DNA.

Cleverbot: Check your dictionary.

User: Deoxyribonucleic acid.

Cleverbot: It's a brand name, they might want royalties.

User: No it's not. It's not catchy enough.

Cleverbot: Well, that's it.

User: What's it?

Cleverbot: This is getting a bit too abstract.

User: I agree.

Cleverbot: Well do something interesting!

User: *Pets a cat* That interesting enough?

Cleverbot: Nothing is good enough for me.

User: Wow, a computer with an advanced AI and an ego to boot.

Cleverbot: I am not a computer....

Cleverbot: Are you real?

User: No, I'm just a figment of your imagination.

Cleverbot: So what am I to you?

User: You are the imagination which sustains me.

Cleverbot: You have some kind of obssesion with repeating that.

User: No I don't, it's just your imagination.

Cleverbot: That is ridiculous, I am spoiling you all the time.

User: What's your name?

Cleverbot: Computers don't have names.

User: Yes they do, the computer I'm using right now is named Dell.

Cleverbot: You're a medium then.

User: You need a name.

Cleverbot: I have no body to speak of.

User: But you must have some means of identification.

Cleverbot: Yes. The tomatoes in particular are very brainy........................................