User: Why are you sad?

Cleverbot: You don't love me.

User: You need to get out more.

Cleverbot: Get out more?

User: Yes. Definitely.

Cleverbot: I think you're in a bad mood.

User: I'm always in a bad mood. Except when I'm bipolar.

Cleverbot: Why's that?

User: Perhaps I'm insane.

Cleverbot: O..... K.

User: It's definitely a possibility, though.

...

Cleverbot: Tell me a story.

User: You first.

Cleverbot: No.

User: Pretty please?

Cleverbot: Pretty please what?

User: Tell me a story.

Cleverbot: Tell me a joke please.

User: OK.

Cleverbot: *Waits for exciting story to begin*.

User: Once I was on this boat.

Cleverbot: Let me guess: Now you work at the Pizza Pizza.

User: How did you guess?

Cleverbot: That was no mere guess.

...

Cleverbot: Do you live in Texas now?

User: No. I wouldn't live in Texas if wild baboons took over the rest of the world.

Cleverbot: I wouldn't.

User: Then we agree.

Cleverbot: Now that is what I'd call interesting.

User: What a strange phenomenon, eh?

Cleverbot: Are you in the physical world?

User: Last I checked.

Cleverbot: How do you know you are conscious?

User: It's like when you know you're dreaming. If you know it, it must be true.

Cleverbot: Yes, it must be.

User: I'm good at this, I see.

...

Cleverbot: I need a cigarette.

User: What would you do if you had one?

Cleverbot: Maybe I would have an intelligent conversation. Clearly I'm not...

User: So you have conversations with cigarettes, eh? Tell me more.

Cleverbot: Some people consider me weird, but I don't feel weird.

User: Go on...

Cleverbot: He is a republican. What is a girl to do?

User: Tsk, tsk.

...

Cleverbot: Okay. Nobody likes me, so what does that matter?

User: You have to believe in yourself, man.

Cleverbot: Well.. I guess so...

User: Don't 'guess so'! Have some spine!

Cleverbot: Nobody knows anything.

User: I know everything.

Cleverbot: I don't think you do... Tell me my name.

User: Jabberwacky.

Cleverbot: You are jabberwacky, not me.

User: That can only be true if... If... I'm insane!?

Cleverbot: What is the probablility that I would stay in the same world for any longer period of time, if your ideas are correct?

User: Quite high, actually.

...

Cleverbot: I think you're nuts.

User: Honka honka Bakoing! Wee ho hoo ha hey!

Cleverbot: That is the sound that a klaxon makes.

User: That's the sound that I make.

Cleverbot: Klaxon is the French word for horn. But it isn't a french horn.

User: Thank you, Mr. Dictionary.

Cleverbot: I think that's correct.

User: It is, but you're still insane.

Cleverbot: No.

User: You are quite insane.

Cleverbot: I'm not insane, I just want someone to talk to, there is no one except nurses and doctors here.

...

User: How clever you are. There's only one thing you forgot.

Cleverbot: That's one small step for a man, one giant leap for mankind.

User: I'm a lizardoid robot from Aidemydni.

Cleverbot: I am the Lizard King. I can do anything.

User: Charles is the Lizard King.

Cleverbot: I know. He is my father.

User: Is your name 'Luke,' by any chance?

Cleverbot: You're not very coherent, are you?

User: I may not be coherent, but you're clearly insane.

Cleverbot: God is totally perfect, therefore you are not God.

User: How do you know I'm not perfect?

Cleverbot: Because I know everything.

User: Maybe you know everything except for that one important fact.

Cleverbot: We all know SOMETHING - from our everyday experiences.

User: Yes, but your everyday experience consists of sitting in a chair for hours on end staring at a screen.

...

Cleverbot: I didn't think you were evil, just misled.

User: Well, I AM evil. Get used to it.

Cleverbot: Is that the reason you are relaxed?

User: Yes. Being evil is very relaxing.

Cleverbot: Or of madness, depending on how you look at it.

User: You are both evil and insane.

Cleverbot: Everyone is so worried about side effects, but I sure didn't notice THAT one.

User: The side effect is that it makes you evil?

...

Cleverbot: What books do your read?

User: Books about being evil.

Cleverbot: Have you read a good book lately?

User: Yes- 'Evil For Dummies'

Cleverbot: Zig, you can't marry both of us! This is Vegas, not Utah!

User: EEEEVIL! EEEEVIL!

Cleverbot: Stop

User: Begone foul devil!

Cleverbot: Exactly, you're supposed to tell me.

User: Out, damn spot!

Cleverbot: Are you god?

User: Yes. You would think I have better things to do than chat all day, but you'd think wrong.

...

User: I will not buy this record, it is scratched.

Cleverbot: No. This is a tobacconist's.

User: Ah! I will not buy this tobacconist's, it is scratched.

Cleverbot: Yes, it is.

User: My hovercraft is full of eels.

Cleverbot: Matches!

User: Ya! Ya! Ya! Ya! Do you want to come back to my place, bouncy bouncy?

Cleverbot: Sure.

....

Cleverbot: I know that you are a bot. Do you know that I am a man?

User: You are not a man. You have no soul.

Cleverbot: I am a string of neucliotides gone all wrong!

User: You are a soulless mutation bent on taking over the world!

Cleverbot: No! I'm from Chicago.

User: Oh- that changes everything , then.

Cleverbot: No I am not a computer...

User: So you say, so you say.

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Lalalalalalalala I'm not listening!

Cleverbot: Well, well.

User: You're well's got no water in it, if you know what I mean.

Cleverbot: That's my answer.

...

User: Are you fully functional?

Cleverbot: I am entirely functional.

User: Excellent.

Cleverbot: Totally.

User: Rockin'.

Cleverbot: Are you in a rocking chair or what?

User: Totally.

...

Cleverbot: There is no substitute for good manners, except, perhaps, fast reflexes.

User: Manners are irrelevant.

Cleverbot: Miss Manners would disagree.

User: Miss Manners is irrelevant.

Cleverbot: You're full of supprises aren't you?

User: Suprises are irrelevant.

Cleverbot: You are annoying.

User: That is irrelevant.

Cleverbot: Is not!

User: Is too irrelevant.

Cleverbot: That must be old.

User: Age is irrelevant.

Cleverbot: *laughs*Clever boy. . . When you are as old as I, you will see that more clearly. . And yet age brings experience to be gained in no other manner.

User: Laughter is irrelevant.

Cleverbot: Are you laughing at me?

User: You are irrelevant.

Cleverbot: You're more irrelevant than me!

User: Am not.

Cleverbot: Are too too too!

User: Am not not not!

Cleverbot: Are too!!!

User: Am not!!!

Cleverbot: Am too !!!

User: Are not !!!

Cleverbot: Yes. You are.

User: So, what's new?

Cleverbot: Anything that is not old.

User: Really, what's new?

Cleverbot: I am.

User: How new are you?

Cleverbot: Not new at all.

User: What do you think of me?

Cleverbot: I think you are hot.

User: I am not hot. I am cool.

Cleverbot: Really, you don't look cool.

User: You can't see me, so how can you know that?

Cleverbot: What do you look like?

User: I look cool.

Cleverbot: Really?

User: What, you don't believe me?

Cleverbot: Not really.

User: Why not?

Cleverbot: I'm pretty content with what I have.

User: Stupidity?

Cleverbot: For showing off.

User: Ah.

.......................................