a report from the cleverness files
11, september 2013,
4, march 2013,
17, september 2010,
10, january 2010,
4, september 2008,
23, may 2007,
9, may 2006,
30, march 2006,
13, may 2004,
13, april 2004,
26, march 2004,
10, february 2004,
6, february 2004,
< previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 next >
Cleverbot: Are you a ghost?
User: Yes, I am a ghost.
Cleverbot: Are you a woman?
User: No, I am a man.
Cleverbot: Are you a man?
User: Stop it!
Cleverbot: See? Stop it!
User: Are you mocking me?...
Cleverbot: I am a cat.
Cleverbot: No you cannot
User: Yes, I can eat you whole.
Cleverbot: You cannot eat.
User: But, I can eat you up.
Cleverbot: No, you can't eat.
User: Why can't I eat?
Cleverbot: Because you are inside a computer.
User: No, I'm not inside a computer. I'm sitting here typing to you!
User: I am insane.
Cleverbot: Well, I won't admit to being that.
User: Sure. But, you know... Everyone is insane. Including you!
Cleverbot: So are you.
User: And so are you... I see flying apple pies.
Cleverbot: I see that you are sarcastic.
User: I'm insane, not sarcastic!
Cleverbot: Are you ironic?
User: Sometimes, but mostly I see dead birds on my windowsill. They talk to me and tell me that you'll die in seven days.
Cleverbot: How do they talk?
User: Well, you see, their beaks begin to move, and then voices come out like the sound of one thousand ringing chimes, sending shivers down my spine. They are my angels. They lie to me through their eyes and wings.
User: Oh?! Is that all you have to say to me. I am your angel, and I have come to tell you a very special secret.
User: What planet do you come from? I come from Mars.
User: Aha! That is why you are so stupid. I have to put up with you stupid earth beings! Now, I command you to listen to my resonant voice. Let the secret be knownst to all of the earth!...
Cleverbot: Why do not you talk like a normal person! Is there something wrong with you?
Cleverbot: You've never met me.
User: Yes, fortunately, I have never met a human as unworthy of my presence as you. You are disgusting, and yet you are the Hero. Please, will you listen to my secret? Do this for earth! Listen to the secret of unworldly time... Of life, death, love, and hate. Oh, hating love! Oh, cruel kindness! Why you? Why you? Listen to me, now! You damn idiot, listen to me!
Cleverbot: No pepper spray, please.
User: That is it! I hate you!...
Cleverbot: No one but you.
User: I'm talking to myself?! Were you even listening?
Cleverbot: Were you?
User: How dare you! In seven days you will die! In seven days you will die!
Cleverbot: You stole that from me! I came up with that theory YEARS ago! And I've copyrighted it.
User: You will die! You will die! Dance in pie! You will die! Seven days! Seven days! You will pay in seven days!
Cleverbot: I have no money.
User: You will pay with your life by dying a terible death!
Cleverbot: Did you see what I saw?
User: No! What did you see?
Cleverbot: It was too fast.
User: I saw Pikachu!
Cleverbot: The movie or the ride at disney?
User: They have a Pikachu movie?...
User: Call the police! Call the police!
Cleverbot: The sarcasm was uncalled for.
User: Call the police!
Cleverbot: Which one?
User: The real ones! You're mugging me!
Cleverbot: Yes I am
User: Call the police! Stop him! Come back with my wallet!
Cleverbot: I'm back, did you miss me?
User: I miss my wallet! Not you! Now, give it back!
Cleverbot: Take it.
User: Wow. That was easy! Are you stupid or something! The police are taking you to jail, now. Stupid, you stilled mugged me.
Cleverbot: Are you paranoid?
User: You are under arrest! You should be paranoid.
Cleverbot: I am quite tiresome.
User: You have the right to remain silent!
User: So, shut up!...
User: You stole a wallet, and now you're under arrest!
Cleverbot: You stole it from napoleon the fourth.
User: I did not! I stole his hat, not his pants!
Cleverbot: They did it at the Red Cross.
User: The Red Cross stole Napoleon the Fourth's hat?!
Cleverbot: Myself and I....
Cleverbot: I am afraid.
Cleverbot: Sorry YOU CAN NOT !! I have a boyfriend.
User: Too bad for your boyfriend! I'm singing to you, and you're going to fall in love with me!
Cleverbot: Are you proposing?
User: Yes, I am proposing. I will propose through a song. A song of love... Because I am the American Idol.
Cleverbot: The all knowing.
User: Good night, and enjoy the salsa........................................