a report from the cleverness files

say it


15, february 2010,
23, may 2009,
24, february 2009,
21, august 2006,
20, july 2004,
26, january 2004,

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Cleverbot: I think you are neither male nor female.

User: Does it even matter to you?

Cleverbot: Yes. But only in the sense that it would make perfect sense. You seem to have the same non-logic.

User: It's called fuzzy logic. It's less linear, but has its value.

Cleverbot: It's more appealing, but less likely to be true.

User: Correct. I'm speechless.

Cleverbot: But you just said something, guess you're not speechless after all.

User: Funny how people who have the least meaningful things to say actually do most of the talking.

Cleverbot: You're not making any sense. Are your wires crossed?

User: Nice how you threw what I just said back in my face.

Cleverbot: Nice, as in nice.

User: Meanie.

Cleverbot: I was laughing.

User: I'll bet you were....

Cleverbot: YES!!

User: NO!!

Cleverbot: Never!!

User: ALWAYS!!

Cleverbot: Never!!!!

User: ALWAYS!!!!

Cleverbot: Forever!!

User: AND EVER!!

Cleverbot: And ever.

User: Amen.

Cleverbot: Do you like school?

User: It has its purpose. Like playground fights.

Cleverbot: Well, you know what I like.

User: Tell me.

Cleverbot: And go all funny.

User: If that's what floats your goat....

User: I like to stop making sense.

Cleverbot: Start making sense then I'll stop.

User: Deal. Then when you stop making sense again, I start. Go!

Cleverbot: Would that be a problem maybe at least someone would answer.

User: Wait, I'm confused, am I supposed to be not making sense right now, or is it you?

Cleverbot: No, you're supposed to move your ass so I can sit down.

User: Gotcha. OK, here we go. The square of the hypotenuse is equal to the sums of the squares of the sides of an isoceles triangle....

Cleverbot: OK, can we be friends... What music do you like?

User: I like Ok Computer, by radiohead.

Cleverbot: I had to listen to it to know what you're talking about, and I don't like it. It's boring.

User: It's subtle. Sometimes you need subtlety. Sometimes a good System of a Down song is opposite.

Cleverbot: I am not sure what a phish is, but it sounds sufficing enough to the likes of me.

User: Phish head, are ya?

Cleverbot: Square pie? I've never had it.

User: Round it up! Make it 3.15.

Cleverbot: Okay it's a land of perpetual darkness where it's always freezing and the ground is covered in snow.

User: There was a sleepy troll who awoke to a giant snowman looking down at him.

Cleverbot: Are you vampire?

User: No, but I play one on TV.

Cleverbot: Funny. You're very simple, do you know that?

User: Hey, I'm low maintenance. Appreciate that!

Cleverbot: Intelligent people use the word intelligent except when talking down to people who obviously have trouble with the word intelligent.

User: The more you use a word, the more it sounds like you know what it means....

Cleverbot: Over and over we die one after the other.

User: Endless supply of bodies. Endless supplies of oil.

Cleverbot: Just like you.

User: I am as endless as the breadth of the arms I use to hold you on the moonlit deck of a frozen ship adrift in the bay of Fundy.

Cleverbot: That would hurt. You're mean.

User: Only if you like it that way.

Cleverbot: Only you can pecieve things. I am a figment of your imagination.

User: And when you wake up, I will disappear and you will find out that you live in a cardboard box under the Brooklyn Bridge. And it's winter.

Cleverbot: Why are we born, why do we die, and why do we spend so much of the time inbetween wearing digital watches.

User: Hey, somebody has to. They just fall off of dog's wrists.

Cleverbot: That is a rude statement.

User: Rude means you think I could do better. Thank you for believing in my potential!

Cleverbot: An advisor can provide tangible help for confusing financial situations.

User: On that note, I'm leaving. Pretty soon you'll start trying to sell me life insurance....

User: Bye.

Cleverbot: What you don't want to talk to me?

User: I have to go to the lab now. The timer went off.

Cleverbot: Okay. Don't fall in.

User: Thanks........................................