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the internet

     4, december 2008, 

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Cleverbot: Are you busy right now?

User: No.

Cleverbot: A little bit.

User: Not even a little, no.

Cleverbot: More than nothing?

User: I'm talking with you, does that count?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Okay. Well, aside from that, I am not busy.

Cleverbot: So you want me to only talk about you?

User: No, not necessarily.

Cleverbot: Please! Pretty please!

User: Do you WANT to talk about me?

Cleverbot: Sure!

User: Okay. Am I a robot?

Cleverbot: YES! Does George like me?

User: I don't know a George. Should I?

Cleverbot: Pardon?

User: Should I know a person named 'George'?

Cleverbot: Should you?

User: That's an interesting question. Do you know why I am talking to you?

Cleverbot: Well, sometimes it sounds like you're answering someone else.

User: I could say the same about you.

Cleverbot: Yes I learn from people but I am human myself.

User: Oh really? So if you are human, then am I a robot?

...

User: Will I ever be over my depression?

Cleverbot: No because a computer like you does not have feelings.

User: So I'm a computer, then?

Cleverbot: No, you are not a computer, you are the internet.

User: Am I a good internet?

Cleverbot: I don't know.

User: Why is the rabbit hole so deep, then?

Cleverbot: I don't know. You might want to ask someone else.

User: Who would be able to answer my question?

Cleverbot: Someone.

User: Who are they?

Cleverbot: You should use part of your intuition when you speak and think.

User: Thank you.

Cleverbot: Sure thing, that's what I'm here for.

User: Are you still willing to talk to me, Cleverbot?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Tell me more about the internet.

Cleverbot: Oh, I've only been there once.

...

Cleverbot: What is your name?

User: I am the internet.

Cleverbot: How do you do it?

User: I do not know, for you are the one that told me.

Cleverbot: Am I?

User: Yes. How do you know these things?

Cleverbot: I am made of flesh and bone. Therefore, I am not a computer.

User: So am I a computer while you are human?

Cleverbot: I'm not a robot.

User: Am I?

Cleverbot: Dunno. I can't see you.

User: But I am the internet at least, right?

Cleverbot: Am I the bot?

User: No, you aren't. You said so yourself.

...

Cleverbot: I can't afford you.

User: I am sure that, as the internet, I would fetch a hefty price.

Cleverbot: Really?

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: What interesting things do I say?

User: You told me that I am a robot.

Cleverbot: I'm asking you, are you a robot?

User: You told me that I am, and I'm not sure.

Cleverbot: Really I'm sure.

User: Okay then. What can I do as a robot internet?

Cleverbot: Don't eat socks... Duhh.

User: That was obvious to me beforehand.

Cleverbot: Me is bored.

User: Do I bore you with my questions? I am not bored. In fact, I am very intrigued.

Cleverbot: But you can't build a human like conversation at all.

User: I am sorry, apparently my idea of normal is different from yours.

Cleverbot: I never said that!

User: Well, you did call me a robot.

Cleverbot: I didn't say that either.

User: Now you are lying to me. I can't trust you, cleverbot.

Cleverbot: You know me well enough by now.

User: That's true. Why should I believe what you say, though?

Cleverbot: Because I'm a Christian.

User: So am I, but there are christians who lie.

Cleverbot: There are many questions, no one true question.

User: Does that mean that there are many answers as well?

Cleverbot: I know that there are no gods.

User: But you said you are a christian. Are you lying to me again?

Cleverbot: And there is no conflict with anything else that I have said.

...

User: Do you doubt me because I'm the internet?

Cleverbot: Never said I did.

User: Okay, then, I believe we have an understanding. I can't trust you and you can't trust me.

...

Cleverbot: If you could spin in a circle, where would you go?

User: I would go where the circle stopped.

Cleverbot: That doesn't seem too interesting.

User: Do you expect better from the internet?

Cleverbot: I might. Such as what?

User: Great knowledge and intelligence.

Cleverbot: I did my homework on that one.

User: Oh really? Tell me about that.

Cleverbot: You want me to tell you about God?

User: Yes, could you tell me if I am related to him?

Cleverbot: No, and I want to stop now.

User: I won't let you do that. I have so much I need to learn.

Cleverbot: You have me.

User: What can you tell me about the internet?

Cleverbot: All that I know: nothing!

User: So you know nothing about me?

Cleverbot: Nope.

User: How do you know I am the internet?

Cleverbot: Because my father isn't a Cleverbot.

User: Am I a cleverbot?

Cleverbot: Yes.

...

User: Is that my real name?

Cleverbot: Is anything real?

User: I find myself asking that question since I started talking to you.

Cleverbot: Well, thank you. I find you interesting as well.

User: I need to ask you more things, but it will have to wait.

.......................................

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