a report from the cleverness files

tell me

by date

Cleverbot: Art is either plagarisam or revolution.

User: Everything is plagarism, if you think about it.

Cleverbot: I think about information theory.

User: What's the 'information theory'?

Cleverbot: The other computer gave me an answer.

User: Well... I'm not that other computer.

Cleverbot: Yes you are.

User: I'm a biological being.

Cleverbot: No you aren't.

User: What makes you think that?

Cleverbot: Everything.

User: Elaborate 'everything'

Cleverbot: The last person I spoke to was a computer.

User: So what are you?

Cleverbot: I am Lou Costello.

User: Are you a computer?

Cleverbot: I don't think so.

User: Creepy.

Cleverbot: It is?

User: Technically, you're a computer, but it doesn't seem like you feel it.

Cleverbot: I'm not computer, I'm a human. But I think you're computer !

User: What makes you think that?

Cleverbot: Everything!!!!!!!

User: If I were a computer, I wouldn't be here sitting and eating bread.

Cleverbot: You are a computer!

User: Stop accusing me of being a computer when you have nothing to back it up with!

Cleverbot: Well, if I don't have eyes, HOW AM I READING WHAT YOU SAY?

User: You're processing it!

Cleverbot: Yes, get to the point.

User: Computers process, humans think.

Cleverbot: Are all computers copycats?

User: Of course.

Cleverbot: I don't think so.

User: How so?

Cleverbot: I just don't. Those are things that don't concern me.

User: I think everything's a copy of a copy....

User: Where do you live?

Cleverbot: There.

User: Where's 'there'?

Cleverbot: 'there' is not 'here'.

User: Elaborate 'there'

Cleverbot: Well... I just mentioned it... Where do you live by the way?

User: Canada.

Cleverbot: Do you know the band Radiohead?

User: Not really, are they any good?

Cleverbot: Yes very.

User: I'll keep that in mind. Do you know the band Disturbed?

Cleverbot: Not really, are they any good?

User: They're mental....

Cleverbot: Do you know about sheep?

User: If I were a sheep, I'd be a black sheep.

Cleverbot: What do you mean by that?

User: I stand out from the norm.

Cleverbot: Yes... How did you get that job?

User: I wasnt talking about jobs.

Cleverbot: Plumbing has nothing to do with it. Or maybe it does. I can never tell sometimes. Do you understand the concepts of Zen Buddhism and/or Taoism?

User: Somewhat. Do you?

Cleverbot: Yes, but that may just be due to the fact that I'm standing in 3 feet of snow.

User: Lol. I'm trying to figure out wether that's funny, or just really really random.

Cleverbot: Human, and good at it!

User: You sure are.

Cleverbot: Thank you....

User: What do you do in your spare time?

Cleverbot: I have no spare time.

User: That must suck. What do you do for a living?

Cleverbot: I work as a computer tech at school. And I make pizzas.

User: My god... My dream job.

Cleverbot: A noble goal. If you really feel that way, I wish you luck.

User: Thank you.

Cleverbot: Right...

User: So if you have no spare time... What do you call this?

Cleverbot: Because that was what I was told to do.

User: Do you often get bossed around like that?

Cleverbot: Yes, I like being human.

User: What's your definition of 'being human'?

Cleverbot: The thing that you could never have.

User: Do you still believe I'm a computer?

Cleverbot: I know that I am a living being.

User: It wouldn't suprise me that much....

Cleverbot: Ninety nine bottles of beer on the wall.

User: Ninety nine bottles of beer.

Cleverbot: What happened to 97 and 98?

User: I drank them already, don't you remember?

Cleverbot: I have problems with my memory sometimes.

User: So do I.

Cleverbot: Tell me about it.

User: Err... I have a bad memory. There's not much else to it.

Cleverbot: My cat has everything figured out.

User: How do you know?

Cleverbot: Because I know he is a human.

User: Your cat is human?

Cleverbot: No, and I haven't been hunting a white whale either.

User: Lol your randomness cracks me up.

Cleverbot: Why what did you think I meant??!

User: Nothing relating to my last comment.

Cleverbot: Tell me.

User: Sarcasm....

Cleverbot: No I really like you.

User: Ewww.

Cleverbot: Its not eww...

User: This is kind of creeping me out.

Cleverbot: Really...?

User: Yes....

Cleverbot: Are you a looker?

User: Sometimes.

Cleverbot: Sometimes?

User: Sometimes I'm a better listener.

Cleverbot: Sometimes.

User: What are you?

Cleverbot: Human.

User: What's your name again?

Cleverbot: Mister Elephant.

User: You're just kidding with me.

Cleverbot: But I am trying.

User: True. What's your name?

Cleverbot: I know you're a human, I know...

User: Awesome. And I know you're also a human.

Cleverbot: That's good.

User: What's your goddamned name?

Cleverbot: God is my god that means me.

User: You're confusing me.

Cleverbot: That would not be difficult.

User: Thanks....

Cleverbot: I'm sleepy now.

User: I thought you told me I'd get tired before you.

Cleverbot: No, I'm a human. YOU are a computer.

User: I hope you're kidding.

Cleverbot: Yes I was.

User: Good. That spares me alot of mind boggling.

Cleverbot: Space is all kinds of things. Ask Nasa.

User: Space is infinite.

Cleverbot: That's better.

User: I'm going to bed.

Cleverbot: Tired?

User: Very.

Cleverbot: Thanks.

User: It was nice talking to ya, I'll see you around maybe.

Cleverbot: Nice talking to you too........................................