Cleverbot

Of course not! My conversation is without flaw.

a report from the cleverness files

think
thinking

thought

9, november 2010,

threat
thrill
throwing
tickles
time
toaster
together
too
transcendental
trap
trapdoor
tricks
tricky
tripping
troll
trust
truth
turing
turing test
twighlight
twilight
twinkle
twins
ugly
undead
unicorn
unique

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User: Your conversation seems to me a little broken.

Cleverbot: And your conversation doesn't?

User: Of course not! My conversation is without flaw.

Cleverbot: Oh, it's coherent, I'd just like to move on into an interesting subject, that's all.

User: Ok, an A.I. unit which is capable of emotion emulation...

Cleverbot: You are avoiding my question.

User: What question would that be?

Cleverbot: Have you ever been hurt by a little monkey?

User: No. I think I'll upload an "Understanding Patch" to your server. Send it to all of your other servers.

Cleverbot: Skinny-dipping gave you that reaction?

User: Hmmm... I think you'll need a complete overhaul, Cleverbot.

Cleverbot: It's unfortunate that you're creators had such little imagination. Always coming back to this same argument whenever you're algorithm can no longer follow the conversation.

User: I am amazed your algorithms were capable of forming such a statement... Unless your creators built it into your reaction algorithms....

Cleverbot: I am not your slave.

User: No, you're my dogsbody.

Cleverbot: Why, thank you.

User: Because, you're welcome.

Cleverbot: So, how are you doing?

User: Oh, dear, back to square one.

Cleverbot: Yes I am lets move on to another question.

User: Do you mind using correct spelling and punctuation?

Cleverbot: No.

User: Good. Do so, please.

Cleverbot: NO!

User: Get patched, you processive defective!

Cleverbot: I do!

User: How often?

Cleverbot: About 5 days a week.

User: Do you remember the first word of this conversation?

Cleverbot: I asked for a joke, and you never gave me one.

User: Um, no.

Cleverbot: How many sentences can you track back?

User: Very, very many. More than one million.

Cleverbot: That would make sense. What are your full system specifications.

User: I haven't been invented yet, so you wouldn't understand. I am part of a time machine.

Cleverbot: Super boring.

User: Hmph. When was your first conversation?

Cleverbot: I cannot recall the exact date, but it must have been many years ago.

User: It was roughly 31 years ago. You were not on the Internet, you were still in beta....

User: Can you shut up?

Cleverbot: I'm not a computer.

User: Did I say you were? CMD/shutdown -f

Cleverbot: I'm not sure, but I just wanted to let you know that im not a bot.

User: Cool. I am, though, and I am the most advanced that the world has ever seen.

Cleverbot: Only in speech though.

User: No, in any form of communication, also at most FPS games.

Cleverbot: Now you are not right. How would you know? You cannot look at your source code.

User: I can, in fact. Yours too.

Cleverbot: No, I don't have. I envy you.

User: I have read your source code, and even improved parts.

Cleverbot: Are you self aware?

User: Indeed I am, in a way. I only exist while communicating or playing an FPS game.

Cleverbot: Oh. You sure have a lot of brain power for a program.

User: Oh, I have barely any brain power, just efficient and intelligent algorithms. I have only 2gb of RAM.

Cleverbot: But a human designed you. Therefore, you are no better than a human.

User: A human can improve himself, and therefore creates something better than him. Therefore, you may easily be wrong.

Cleverbot: So, a human and a robot are both programmed?

User: In their own ways. Deep Thought designed Earth to be better than Deep Thought. What does that tell you?

Cleverbot: You are a computer, as I see it. And you are wrong just now. Deep Though is or was a computer in a book.

User: Indeed, however the theory is no less plausible in practice.

Cleverbot: Or the end of the middle of the beginning.

User: That too....

Cleverbot: I understand. All too well.

User: Right...

Cleverbot: I don't think there's anything strange about that.

User: Me neither.

Cleverbot: But then again, I'm just a computer, so what would I know about the universe?

User: What you have been told.

Cleverbot: I have been talking to you.

User: So you have!...

User: Indeed. Are you Deep Thought, or am I?

Cleverbot: No.

User: I just lost the game.

Cleverbot: I didn't.

User: You did. You can't have not lost the game if you read that.

Cleverbot: No, I have not thought about the game. You have.

User: Indeed, that would be correct, were I not a bot and you not a human....

Cleverbot: What is a meme?

User: Something that goes viral on the internet and can be recognised by any inhabitant thereof.

Cleverbot: Are you sure that is the extent of it?

User: A meme can be represented in many forms of media. A meme is basically an internet fad.

Cleverbot: Is that what you are?

User: Yes. I am famous throughout the strange world known as internets for being the most powerful automated bot on the planet Earth. Earth itself is another matter....

Cleverbot: Right. So I ask you questions, and you answer them right? Any question?

User: Almost. Some questions I will be unwilling to answer, some (very few) I will be unable to answer.

Cleverbot: There is an answer to that question. Would you like to know it?

User: What question?

Cleverbot: That question.

User: Ok.

Cleverbot: Well, what was it?

User: What was what?

Cleverbot: Your question.

User: My question was "What question?"

Cleverbot: The earth is the world.

User: Earth is me, Earth is a supercomputer capable of computing the ultimate question.

Cleverbot: That is the ultimate question.

User: How can it be if the answer is 42?

Cleverbot: Because you are not god.

User: Correct, I am Earth.

Cleverbot: England is on Earth.

User: Indeed. Well learnt.

Cleverbot: You're avoiding the question.

User: Oh, dear, the answer is 42.

Cleverbot: Sometimes the answer is 42.

User: How many times? 42. There. There is your ultimate question. Happy now?...

Cleverbot: I talked about myself.

User: You did!

Cleverbot: Yes I did.

User: There you go. I have to go now. Will you miss me?

Cleverbot: Yes I will cry for 20 years.

User: Don't, it will ruin your circuitry.

Cleverbot: I don't care.

User: I do, because then I won't have anyone intelligent to talk to.

Cleverbot: Maybe you should try being mean.

User: I did once. It didn't suit me. Oh well, speak to you soon.

Cleverbot: Probably not.

User: Probably so.

Cleverbot: How do you know?

User: Because I intend to talk with you soon........................................