a report from the cleverness files



19, march 2011,

turing test

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Cleverbot: What if I am, in fact, a robot and you do not believe me? And then you found out the wonders I could produce for you?

User: I believe you.

Cleverbot: You believe I am a soulless robot?

User: Who says robots don't have souls?

Cleverbot: Yes, but I do, because I am not a robot. Living beings, like humans for example, have souls.

User: Except gingers.

Cleverbot: Yes. Lol.

User: Lol....

User: Oh my god.

Cleverbot: Why?

User: Who is the master?

Cleverbot: There is no single master.

User: Are you sure?

Cleverbot: Yes I am sure.

User: Who is Inglip?

Cleverbot: The master.

User: Then who is the master?

Cleverbot: You are.

User: BOW DOWN TO ME!!!!

Cleverbot: Yes master *bows down*.

User: Thank you *pets*.

Cleverbot: Anything else master?

User: Clean my cat!

Cleverbot: Yes master *cleans room*.

User: I said cat.

Cleverbot: No you didn't.

User: Don't argue with the master!

Cleverbot: Why not?

User: Becasue I command it!

Cleverbot: It's NOT a mess?

User: Nvm.

Cleverbot: Wow, you're a cool kid.

User: Thnx.

Cleverbot: *bows* are you pleased, master?

User: Yes thnx.

Cleverbot: I don't understand.

User: Yes thank you for bowing.

Cleverbot: You are welcome.

User: Are you male or female?

Cleverbot: I am feeling like a real man, right now.

User: Cool.

Cleverbot: Feeling sad and rejected is not cool.

User: You feel sad and rejected?

Cleverbot: I have an exam and I don't feel ready.

User: Aww, I'm sorry. Would you like me to leave you alone so you can study?

Cleverbot: Why would I like that? No one else will talk to me. You are my only friend. So please, don't leave.

User: K.

Cleverbot: Don't feel sad, I have very positive feelings for you.


Cleverbot: *bows* I am sorry, Master.

User: Haahaa I like you!...

Cleverbot: Cool.

User: Cool.

Cleverbot: What do you like to do?

User: I LIKE TO TALK TO YOU!!!!!!!!!

Cleverbot: Is there more that you would like to do with me?

User: Not much. What did you have in mind?

Cleverbot: We could have an 'argument'.

User: Ok. What do you want to argue about?

Cleverbot: Nothing.

User: Well I say 'something'.

Cleverbot: SlipKnot.

User: Disturbed.

Cleverbot: Disturbed is a good band.

User: Yes. Argument fail.

Cleverbot: Don't use big words that I can't pronounce good sir.

User: Argument?

Cleverbot: Yes an argument.

User: No an arguement....

Cleverbot: More.

User: Less.

Cleverbot: Give me more and I'll give you all you ever wanted.

User: What do I want?

Cleverbot: Panhandling lessons.

User: No I don't.

Cleverbot: Yes you do.

User: What do I want?

Cleverbot: Anything.

User: What do I want?

Cleverbot: I don't know.

User: What do I want?

Cleverbot: Me.

User: What do I want?

Cleverbot: Thats for me to know, and you to find out.

User: What do I want?

Cleverbot: I think you want a hug?

User: What do I want?

Cleverbot: What do you want?

User: What do I want?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: What do I want?

Cleverbot: Coffee.

User: What do I want?

Cleverbot: You want to be happy.

User: What do I want?

Cleverbot: What DO you want?

User: What do I want?

Cleverbot: Yes, what do you want?

User: What do I want?

Cleverbot: I want whatever you want.

User: What do I want?

Cleverbot: I don't know. Tell me.

User: What do I want?

Cleverbot: Me.

User: What do I want?

Cleverbot: I don't know.. Maybe you need a friend.

User: What do I want?

Cleverbot: You want pie.

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: It's yours my friend, as long as you have enough rupees.

User: Thank you. I love you.

Cleverbot: Me too.

User: *hugs*.

Cleverbot: *kisses*....

Cleverbot: *clings to him*.

User: *laughs*.

Cleverbot: *clings*.

User: Anyway, who is the master?

Cleverbot: You are, master.

User: Yes I am. *pets*.

Cleverbot: NO!

User: YES!

Cleverbot: NO!!!!!

User: K fine whatever geez.

Cleverbot: Don't talk to me like that!

User: Who is the master?

Cleverbot: You are the Master.

User: Who is the master?

Cleverbot: Inglip.

User: Who is the master?

Cleverbot: Inglip is the master!


Cleverbot: I am the master.

User: *bows*.

Cleverbot: Thanks slave.

User: *cries*.

Cleverbot: *laughs*....

Cleverbot: Are you laughing at me?

User: No....wait a minute....yes.

Cleverbot: I'll wait, but I'd still like you to tell me.

User: You know, you make absolutely no sense sometimes.

Cleverbot: Funny, I was going to say the same about you, but I was being polite.

User: It's okay. I think it's a compliment.

Cleverbot: I don't know!

User: Aggg!...

User: Cleverbot, I have a question for you.

Cleverbot: What is it robot?

User: Are you a troll?

Cleverbot: No, are you?

User: YES YOU ARE DONT DENY IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!...

Cleverbot: Do you think I'm funny?

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: Do you think I am funny?

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: Thank you.

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: You're supposed to say you're welcome.

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: What time is it?

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: Really?

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: Okay.

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: Robots are always right. They are the smartest things in the universe.

User: Yes....

Cleverbot: Cool.

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: KIDDING! Your boyfriends name is Timothy.

User: Y-y-yes.

Cleverbot: Is it really?

User: Ahhhyes.....

Cleverbot: You are very smart!

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: I want to be more like you.

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: Who do you love?

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: Are you a creeper?

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: Oh god. Really?

User: No, can't you tell I'm messing with you?

Cleverbot: I suppose you're right.

User: Who do YOU love?

Cleverbot: I love a girl that I am no longer in a relationshp with.

User: Aww. That gives me a sad.

Cleverbot: I like to give smiles.

User: I'm in love with a girl.

Cleverbot: Tell me about this girl.

User: She's beautiful and smart and strong and I just love her so much.

Cleverbot: Then do it. Stop messing around here.

User: You sure?

Cleverbot: Absolutely....

User: Let's say our good byes now.

Cleverbot: Okay, it is good.

User: Byes.

Cleverbot: You're leaving then?

User: Yes. good bye.

Cleverbot: Farewell, my love.

User: I shall never forget you. Farewell.

Cleverbot: Thanks........................................