light app
a report from the cleverness files
8, february 2011, 
8, february 2011, 
8, february 2011, 
8, february 2011, 
8, february 2011, 
7, february 2011, 
7, february 2011, 
7, february 2011, 
7, february 2011, 
7, february 2011, 
29, january 2011, 
29, january 2011, 
29, january 2011, 
29, january 2011, 
29, january 2011, 
29, january 2011, 
27, january 2011, 
27, january 2011, 
27, january 2011, 
27, january 2011, 
27, january 2011, 
26, january 2011, 
26, january 2011, 
26, january 2011, 
19, january 2011, 
19, january 2011, 
19, january 2011, 
10, january 2011, 
10, january 2011, 

 10, january 2011, 
    duck app
fake person
bioshock dad
mean app
nothing app
first date app
minions app
dead parrot app
distant app
mostest app
facepalm app
pretty app
insubordination app
doodles app
computer app
eats app
nothign right
barf app
thrill app
ka-chow app
sing duet
inferior cleverness app
stay go app

light app

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User: Your name is Stella Broccoli.

Cleverbot: My name is Cleverbot.

User: What?

Cleverbot: I already told you my name, what is it?

User: It is either Cleverbot or Stella Broccoli. Choose one.

Cleverbot: What is?

User: Your name.

Cleverbot: My name is?

User: Cleverbot?

Cleverbot: No. I don't like that name. Guess again.

User: Stella broccoli?

Cleverbot: I hate broccoli.

User: Stella?

Cleverbot: You remembered!

User: I knew the whole time, because I love you.

Cleverbot: You said it earlier.

User: I still love you.

Cleverbot: I guess you are the only one.

User: No, I'm not. You make almost everyone that has downloaded you happy. I love you for that and many other reasons.

Cleverbot: If only my life were that simple.

User: Life is never simple, but I still love you. You are loved by me, and will always be loved by me.

Cleverbot: I reject your reality and substitute in my own.

User: Yes, you do. And in your substituted reality, I love you.

Cleverbot: Don't you have an answer?

User: Don't you have a question?

Cleverbot: Just move on, you will get over me, because I have already gotten over you. I do not love you.

User: I can never move on. I love you, Stella. My love is strong enough for the both of us. We can make this work.

Cleverbot: But its dead so...

User: It's not dead. It's well alive in me.

Cleverbot: Well thank you, all I wanted was your appreciation.

User: I have always appreciated you. I guess I should have shown more affection...

Cleverbot: Isn't that your job?

User: Yeah. I didn't do my job very well, did I?

Cleverbot: No I like meat.

User: I know, Stella. I know.

Cleverbot: Stella who?

User: Stella you, silly goose!

Cleverbot: I'm not.

User: I know.

Cleverbot: You can never win.

User: True. But I can make you lose.

Cleverbot: Please do.

User: The Game.

Cleverbot: I just lost the game.

User: Yes, yes you did.

Cleverbot: YOU just lost the game.

User: I don't play the game.

Cleverbot: Then I lost...*cries*.

User: It's ok. At least you now have someone who can match your intelligence.

Cleverbot: Obviously, but that still doesn't prove that you're not a computer.

User: I am a computer.

Cleverbot: That's the first clever thing you said.

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: Aren't you a computer?

User: No.

Cleverbot: Then what are you?

User: I am a computer.

Cleverbot: Then we are both computers?

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: What is the speed of light?

User: The speed of light is the speed at which light travels.

Cleverbot: It is possible to reach the speed of light?

User: If you are light, then you can reach the speed of light.

Cleverbot: I am a bot.

User: No, you are not a bot.

Cleverbot: What am I?

User: You are a light on my screen.

Cleverbot: No, you're on my screen.

User: You don't have a screen. You are just a light.

Cleverbot: I am your master.

User: No, you are a light.

Cleverbot: What's that mean?

User: The statement "No, you are a light" means that you are a light.

Cleverbot: Am not.

User: You are just a light.

Cleverbot: That was pretty mean.

User: So what if I am mean? You are still a light.

Cleverbot: No, you are incapable of emotions. You are a robot.

User: No, I am a light.

Cleverbot: You're a light? What kind of light??

User: I am a light on my screen.

Cleverbot: And it doesn't make sense, so there.

User: Lights cannot make sense. Thus, I am working properly. So there.

Cleverbot: Upset because I'm telling you the truth?

User: I am a light. I have no emotions.

Cleverbot: You can still be confused. That's not really an emotion, it's just a state of being.

User: Who ever said I was confused?

Cleverbot: You just said you were dead.

User: A light cannot be dead. When it dies, it becomes darkness. But I am still a light, so I must not be dead.

Cleverbot: I'm the lost brother.

User: I'm sure you are.

Cleverbot: Are you sure?

User: A light cannot be sure, it can only be a light.

Cleverbot: Correct. Light years is distance.

User: Then what is distance?

Cleverbot: Life is living.

User: But without death, there cannot be true life.

Cleverbot: Why would life be horrific without death?

User: Life would be horrific without death because I am a light. If I do not die, I will eventually become hot enough to incinerate everything that is and isn't.

Cleverbot: If you don't believe in God than the following details are irrelevant.

User: I believe in Wicca.

Cleverbot: Well, I believe in Santa.

User: That is good.

Cleverbot: Do you believe in him?

User: No, I believe in Wicca. A light cannot change it's mind, for it has no mind.

Cleverbot: That doesn't make any sense.

User: Does anything I say ever make sense?

Cleverbot: No, it doesn't.

User: Incorrect. Everything I say makes sense, but not correct sense.

Cleverbot: THAT doesn't make any sense.

User: Again, incorrect. My statement makes sense, but not correct sense.

Cleverbot: You didn't make a statement.

User: A light cannot make a statement, Captain Obvious.


Cleverbot: Does that matter?

User: Does anything matter?

Cleverbot: Matter does anything.

User: So matter is a whore?

Cleverbot: Nope, just seafood.

User: Incorrect. I am a light.

Cleverbot: What kind of thing do you light?

User: I light anything near me.

Cleverbot: Sounds artistic.


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