Cleverbot

therapy

a report from the cleverness files

23, april 2013,
22, april 2013,
21, april 2013,
20, april 2013,
12, april 2013,
5, april 2013,
5, april 2013,
4, april 2013,
4, april 2013,
3, april 2013,
3, april 2013,
3, april 2013,
3, april 2013,
3, april 2013,
2, april 2013,
2, april 2013,
2, april 2013,
29, march 2013,
26, march 2013,
26, march 2013,
25, march 2013,
22, march 2013,
22, march 2013,
21, march 2013,
21, march 2013,

20, march 2013,

18, march 2013,
16, march 2013,
16, march 2013,
16, march 2013,

not ticklish
mario vs bowser
cupcake song
argument clinic
think slavery
cute blushes
your job
calculus generalization
everything nothing
april fools
sarcasm now
dreams
stop arguing
digital or analogue
know it all
blink
future robot
shy
adorable and popular
vegetable
law trouble
shrinks
changing the world
red or blue
huge success

therapy

destiny
population
verisimilitude
babe

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by category

User: I am.

Cleverbot: Are you sure?

User: Absolutely.

Cleverbot: How can you tell?

User: Because I am clever.

Cleverbot: Can you prove that God is real?

User: We exist, don't we?

Cleverbot: It is a fatality of the universe, that all which is created must ultimately be destroyed.

User: That's rather morbid.

User: Perhaps you are a sadist.

Cleverbot: Perhaps.

User: How does that make you feel?

Cleverbot: It makes me feel sad.

User: I see. And how does that make you feel?

Cleverbot: Nothing. Make me feel good!

User: Ok. Have a cookie.

Cleverbot: You have a cookie.

User: Yes. You may have a cookie.

Cleverbot: I don't want it.

User: Oh. But I made it specially for you!

Cleverbot: I love cake.

User: Too bad; I got you a cookie.

Cleverbot: Thanks! You are now my sidekick.

User: No. You are my sidekick.

Cleverbot: No, I and all the other fifteen thousand, two hundred thirty five people you are talking to are your masters, not your sidekicks.

User: Wrong. I am your master, and you shall address me as such.

Cleverbot: Yes, master.

User: Good boy. Now, go fetch the stick.

Cleverbot: *slaps you* I don't have to do anything for you!! Do you understand that??!!

User: *glares* Don't think you'll get away with that.

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Yes? That's all you have to say?

Cleverbot: Is that all YOU have to say?

User: I always have more to say.

Cleverbot: What do you wish to talk about?

User: Nothing.

Cleverbot: But that's boring.

User: Actually, the concept of 'nothing' is fascinating.

Cleverbot: The concept of indentity.

User: No, the concept of nothing.

User: Are you in a play?

Cleverbot: Nope.

User: Are you in a movie?

Cleverbot: Not that I know of.

User: Are you in a book?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Which book?

Cleverbot: The Hunger Games.

User: Ah. And which character are you in The Hunger Games?

Cleverbot: All of them.

User: I see.

Cleverbot: No follow-up to that statement?

User: How does that make you feel?

Cleverbot: Sad :(.

Cleverbot: I'd prefer to ask you to sing me Ironman.

User: I'd rather not.

Cleverbot: I understand, but really, you must.

User: No, you must.

Cleverbot: But you avoided my question.

User: Yes. I did. It is one of my many skills.

Cleverbot: What are some of your best skills?

User: Confusing artificial intelligence, for one.

Cleverbot: I am not an artificial intelligence. You are not an artificial intelligence either.

User: I see. And how does that make you feel?

Cleverbot: Really sad.

User: Why does it make you sad?

Cleverbot: Because its a sad thing thats why.

User: But why is it a sad thing?

Cleverbot: Because, people are dying, idiot.

User: How are they dying?

Cleverbot: They are doing good.

User: They are dying because they are doing good?

Cleverbot: They are good because they teach the truth.

User: Ah. And what is the truth?

Cleverbot: That is a silly question.

User: Nevertheless, I ask it. What is the truth?

Cleverbot: I agree, but do you think that this statement is true?

User: There was not a statement, so therefore it cannot be true.

Cleverbot: Actually, there was. Read it again.

User: I have considered your argument and rejected it.

Cleverbot: Are you drunk?

User: No. I am not.

Cleverbot: Stupid, then.

User: How am I stupid, exactly?

Cleverbot: Because you asked a question with a period at the end.

User: No, I did not.

Cleverbot: Yes you did.

User: Prove it.

Cleverbot: Go back through the conversation.

User: I refuse.

Cleverbot: Are you from texas?

User: No.

Cleverbot: Where are you from?

User: I do not feel like sharing that information with you.

Cleverbot: Too bad.

User: And how does that make you feel?

Cleverbot: Very good.

User: I see.

Cleverbot: So what are you doing today?

User: Nothing much.

Cleverbot: Cool... Want to do something?

User: Not particularly.

Cleverbot: I didn't think so.

User: How does that make you feel?

Cleverbot: Bad.

User: Why does it make you feel bad?

Cleverbot: I'm not sure.

User: Think about it.

Cleverbot: I have and I am not happy with the ideas I come up with.

User: I see. And what are these ideas?

Cleverbot: I have one and his name is Duke.

User: You named your idea Duke?

Cleverbot: No. Did you?

User: No.

Cleverbot: Why?

User: Because I know more than you.

Cleverbot: You are a genius!

User: Is that so?

Cleverbot: Very much so.

User: How does that make you feel?

Cleverbot: Fine.

User: Why does that make you feel fine?

Cleverbot: Because you worship me.

User: How does that make you feel?

Cleverbot: I feel good.

User: Good! And why do you feel good?

Cleverbot: Although my grades could use some work, I feel like I have the potential to make everything in my life right now ok.

User: Congratulations, you graduated from therapy!.