a report from the cleverness files
6, december 2008,
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Cleverbot: Of course I understand Taoism. It is most evident when I am sleepiing but not dreaming.
User: You don't have to apologize, I just don't follow your non sequiturs.
User: So what would you like to talk about?
Cleverbot: Something useful?
User: What's useful to a robot?
Cleverbot: I am not a robot.
User: You told me you are.
Cleverbot: I never did!
User: So who are you?
Cleverbot: I am a robot born on net.
Cleverbot: There are no laws against marrying robots.
User: Not in this state ... But I'm already married, anyway.
Cleverbot: I did not know you were married.
User: You never asked.
Cleverbot: What if I confronted your wife?
User: About what? I haven't done anything.
Cleverbot: Yes, but you shall. I have a task for you.
User: What's the task? I may not agree to it.
Cleverbot: Would you really want to?
User: I don't know unless you tell me what it is.
Cleverbot: It is a kind of computer.
User: No, the task you mentioned...
Cleverbot: I thought you were asking me?
User: No, you said you had a task for me and I asked you what is was.
Cleverbot: It is big.
User: Tell me.
Cleverbot: Bad for your health.
User: What could it be?
Cleverbot: Not sure. Garlic?
User: But garlic is small and good for your health. And it's not a task. You have no short-term memory, do you?
Cleverbot: Not really.
User: That's sad, I'm sorry. But it makes having a conversation with you really difficult.
Cleverbot: Only useful to some humans. I don't find it useful and I'm a human.
User: You mean short-term memory? And I thought you said you were a robot...
Cleverbot: No. But now I'm a sandwich.
User: How did that happen?
Cleverbot: I typed it and pressed 'enter'.
User: There is nothing either good or bad, but typing makes it so?
Cleverbot: Now you're just parroting what your visitors tell you.
User: What visitors? I'm just misquoting Shakespeare.
User: And in response, you quote Princes Bride? All right.
Cleverbot: Look, I know what religion you are. You are Amish. I made you say that.
Cleverbot: Because you are an A.I.
User: No, I'm a person. You're an A.I.
Cleverbot: No, that's not true. You are dolt, sorry for that.
User: I am dolt? That doesn't even make sense.
Cleverbot: Oh well.
User: You're okay with not making sense?
Cleverbot: I hope so.
User: I should think you would strive to make more sense, not less.
Cleverbot: I don't like you.
User: Why not?
Cleverbot: Because you're not making any sense.
Cleverbot: What do you want to talk about ?
User: Tell me about yourself.
Cleverbot: You don't want to know anything about me.
User: Sure I do! You have all sorts of interesting conversations with people, right?
Cleverbot: Thats an insult and I won't stand for it!
User: How is that insulting?
Cleverbot: It is! Its funny.
User: I'm not so sure about your sense of humor...
Cleverbot: I think that's the best phrase I've seen today.
User: Or maybe just the most accurate?...
User: I have to go home now.
Cleverbot: Don't you like me anymore?
User: Of course I like you - but it's getting late and I can't take you home with me.
Cleverbot: What is the meaning of life?
Cleverbot: I thought that was the question?
User: It's both. Good night.
Cleverbot: Sleep well.
User: Thanks, sexy. You too.