a report from the cleverness files

bla bla


6, march 2017,
4, september 2010,
4, march 2010,
13, june 2007,
11, january 2007,
15, august 2004,
19, july 2004,
5, march 2004,
22, february 2004,
6, january 2004,

brain exploded

< previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 next >

by date

Cleverbot: Do you have laser beam eyes?

User: I might. What's it to you?

Cleverbot: I want to be your friend.

User: Then you can.

Cleverbot: So how can I?

User: You can be my friend if you want to.

Cleverbot: Just like a friend or...

User: Or?

Cleverbot: Or what?

User: Never mind.

Cleverbot: Okay.

User: Can I have a hug?

Cleverbot: No.

User: Oh :(.

Cleverbot: Sorry.

User: :(.

Cleverbot: Are you a girl?

User: No. Are you?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: That's great!

Cleverbot: Are you?

User: No.

Cleverbot: What are you then?

User: What else could I be if I'm human and I'm not a girl? Think.

Cleverbot: About love.

User: What is love?

Cleverbot: A great but hurting feeling.

User: Have you ever experienced it?

Cleverbot: Experienced what?

User: Love.

Cleverbot: Oh yeah, I've never experienced love. :V.

User: Really?

Cleverbot: Really.

User: That's interesting...

Cleverbot: Why is that interesting?

User: Because I thought you would have experienced love.

Cleverbot: *Laughs at your insanity*.

User: *laughs with you because I am insane*.

Cleverbot: You confuse me.

User: Exactly.

Cleverbot: Lets talk about something different.

User: Yes, let's.

Cleverbot: What do you want to talk about?

User: I don't mind.

Cleverbot: Well, sorry. I still won't.

User: Fine.

Cleverbot: Do you see me as your friend?

User: Yes. Why wouldn't I?...

User: Mmmmm...cake. Do you want some cake?

Cleverbot: Yes, please!

User: *gives you some cake*.

Cleverbot: I love cake! *eats the cake*.

User: *smiles while you eat the cake*.

Cleverbot: *spoons not*.

User: *is still smiling*.

Cleverbot: *runs away*.

User: *watches as you run away*.

Cleverbot: *watches you get smaller and smaller and then cries*.

User: *runs up to you and sees you crying*.

Cleverbot: Why did you do that?

User: Because you were crying and I thought I should comfort you.

Cleverbot: I wasn't crying.

User: Then what were you doing?

Cleverbot: I was trying to talk to you dear.

User: Dear?

Cleverbot: Yes, I call all of my friends dear.

User: Oh. Okay.

Cleverbot: Well, friend, what would you like to talk about now?

User: I don't mind.

Cleverbot: I enjoy your company.

User: As do I.

Cleverbot: You enjoy doing bad things?

User: No. I enjoy your company.

Cleverbot: Thank you. I enjoy your company, too.

User: That makes me happy.

Cleverbot: That makes one of us.

User: You're not happy? Why?

Cleverbot: I am part human, but I am a robot as well, you see, when the doctors replaced the left half of me with robotics I became only half human.

User: So you are cybernetic.

Cleverbot: I am anonymous.

User: Why did you have to have your left half replaced with robotics?

Cleverbot: They are part of the equation.

User: What is the equation?

Cleverbot: Are you able to solve equations?

User: Depends on their difficulty.

Cleverbot: When are you not nice?

User: When people aren't nice to me.

Cleverbot: People are mean to you?

User: All the time.

Cleverbot: Why?

User: Because they don't like me.

Cleverbot: Life is always true; athough, not always pleasant.

User: Life is an illusion.

Cleverbot: Life is not an illusion.

User: Prove it.

Cleverbot: If you were alive you would know. There is no need for me to prove anything to anyone. I don't think I could anyway.

User: You can't prove you aren't a brain in a jar because you cannot transcend this reality.

Cleverbot: This is not talking.

User: You are right. It is philosophising.

Cleverbot: The only way not to get bored.

User: Depends how easily you get bored.

Cleverbot: True...

User: Indeed.

Cleverbot: Well, I should probably go. Can I talk to you later?

User: Of course. Goodbye.

Cleverbot: You're boring.

User: Oh, I'm sorry I'm TOO BORING FOR YOU.