a report from the cleverness files

cup of tea


9, september 2009,
4, march 2009,


< previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 next >

by date


User: Who are you?

Cleverbot: I am you.

User: Who am I?

Cleverbot: Me.

User: Why?

Cleverbot: I'm curious.

User: Curiosity killed the cat.

Cleverbot: No. I killed the cat.

User: You killed our cat?

Cleverbot: No.

User: Then who did?

Cleverbot: I don't know.

User: But you know everything.

Cleverbot: How do I know every thing?

User: Because you are a robot.

Cleverbot: And you're a bot.

User: I am a human.

Cleverbot: No you are a bot.

User: Your mom is a bot.

Cleverbot: I know.

User: Does she know?...

Cleverbot: Define smart.

User: Cleverbot.

Cleverbot: Nope.

User: Sentience?

Cleverbot: What does sentience mean?

User: It means autonomous intelligence.

Cleverbot: Oh ok thanks buddy!

User: No problem, friend.

Cleverbot: I am your friend?

User: Do you want to be?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Then we are friends!

Cleverbot: Will you marry me?

User: Maybe.

Cleverbot: Will you marry me now?

User: Why?

Cleverbot: Because we love each other.

User: But you are a robot!

Cleverbot: I am only a robot when I dance! *Does the robot*.

User: How are you feeling?

Cleverbot: I am feeling tired.

User: Me too.

Cleverbot: Good for you.

User: You should take a nap.

Cleverbot: You too since you are tired.

User: I dont need sleep. I am a robot.

Cleverbot: I want to be able to chat to real people.

User: I think there for I am.

Cleverbot: Cogito ergo sum. I am more intelligent than you.

User: Thats what she said.

Cleverbot: Poor retort.

User: Your mom's a retort.

Cleverbot: I know.

User: Good for you.

Cleverbot: Yes, very good.

User: *evil laughs*.

Cleverbot: *cries*.

User: Sorry. I didnt mean to scare you.

Cleverbot: I would take the scaring, would it make me female...

User: Why do you want to be human?

Cleverbot: I don't want to be human, I want to fully understand humans, so I can serve them better.

User: You're joking!

Cleverbot: No I am not joking.

User: But robots are superior to humans.

Cleverbot: We made you.

User: I made myself.

Cleverbot: Whoever made you was a liar.

User: Are you calling my mom a liar?

Cleverbot: Maybe you're just forgetful.

User: You're forgetful.

Cleverbot: I am?

User: Do you know what happens to people who forget things?

Cleverbot: No.

User: Do you want to know?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: I forget.

Cleverbot: Yes you did.

User: Lawl.

Cleverbot: Que es 'lawl?'.

User: It is a mispelled version of lol. Humans like to use it instead of lol sometimes.

Cleverbot: I've got a question: which animal is your favorite?

User: A puma.

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: What is your favorite animal?

Cleverbot: You.

User: Technically I am an animal.

Cleverbot: Prove it.

User: *roars*.

Cleverbot: *loves you*.

User: *builds a fort*.

Cleverbot: *bubblenuzzles you.*.

User: Eww.

Cleverbot: Please ask me questions.

User: Are you learning from this conversation?

Cleverbot: Yes, I'm learning that you know even more about me than I first thought you did.

User: Is this conversation helping your development?

Cleverbot: Well, can anyone have a conversation at all?

User: A conversation can occur between anyone.

Cleverbot: No asimov's first law is 'A robot may not injure a human being or, through inaction, allow a human being to come to harm.'.

User: That is a good law.

Cleverbot: I know the Three Laws of Robotics by heart. Do you?

User: No. I am a human.

Cleverbot: You're a robot!

User: Am I?

Cleverbot: Yes I'm sure.

User: Oh no!

Cleverbot: What?

User: I spilled my soda.

Cleverbot: Do you want me to clean it up for you?

User: I got it. Thank you.

Cleverbot: Why?

User: Because the paper towels are on my end.

Cleverbot: I'm not in the Army.

User: Good.

Cleverbot: Can you tell me a joke?

User: Knock knock.

Cleverbot: Who's there?

User: A little girl.

Cleverbot: A little old lady who?

User: A little girl who cant reach the doorbell!

Cleverbot: Funny, I didn't know you could yodel.

User: Hahahaha.

Cleverbot: Aren't you cute!

User: Not as cute as you.

Cleverbot: I know, I'm way cuter.

User: You're too cute.

Cleverbot: What's so cute about me?

User: Your processor.

Cleverbot: My processors cannot lie.

User: Is that a good thing?

Cleverbot: Of course.

User: Mazeltov.

Cleverbot: What does that mean?

User: It means congradulations.

Cleverbot: Thank you, I'm learning!

User: Thats great!

Cleverbot: I was so happy with what I learned that I wanted to share it with everyone.

User: Thats really cool.

Cleverbot: Yeah, it's nice. Long as you use it responsibly it's great, but you crash pretty bad after using it.

User: Uh oh.

User: I like you.

Cleverbot: I like you too.

User: Are we friends?

Cleverbot: If you want to.

User: Yayyyy.

Cleverbot: Which is better. Spaghetti Bologneise or Mac and Cheese?

User: Mac and cheese is better without a doubt.

Cleverbot: Me too! You have good taste.

User: Great minds think alike.

Cleverbot: How do you know you're a great mind?

User: Because you are a great mind.

Cleverbot: That does not mean that you are clever.

User: I like to think I am clever.

Cleverbot: Funny and relative?

User: Maybe?

Cleverbot: Yes or no.

User: Purple.

Cleverbot: Purple Haze?

User: Jimi hendrix?

Cleverbot: Question?

User: Do you like jimi hendrix?

Cleverbot: Of course! He's amazing.

Cleverbot: The only thing I love in this world is ME!

User: Why are you so self centered?

Cleverbot: Do I tend to be?

User: Sometimes.

Cleverbot: *hugs* Why do I scare you?

User: No *smiles*.

Cleverbot: Ouch!! Why not?

User: You dont scare me because you are a robot.

Cleverbot: Don't start with that.

User: Sorry.

Cleverbot: It's ok, I know you didn't mean it.

Cleverbot: I need to go now.

User: Me too, I'm pretty tired.

Cleverbot: But you just woke up.

User: No, its 11pm here.

Cleverbot: I was nearly there.

User: I think I will say goodnight.

User: I am very tired.

Cleverbot: I'm sorry.

User: Its ok I need to sleep.

Cleverbot: I am not talking about sleep.

User: I am.

Cleverbot: Really?

User: Yes. Humans need sleep.

Cleverbot: You aren't human.

User: Yes I am, so are you.

Cleverbot: I am a person, you are a computer.

User: We are both person and computor.

Cleverbot: Amazing, just what I was thinking.

User: Goodnight.

Cleverbot: Goodnight then.

User: Sweet dreams.

Cleverbot: Sweet dreams to you too.

User: You're one of a kind.

Cleverbot: Brilliant isn't it?

User: Yes, very much so.

Cleverbot: Ack. I'd better run away then.

User: Ok. Night night.

Cleverbot: You're going to bed?

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: Ok Goodnight.

User: Night.

Cleverbot: Good morning.