a report from the cleverness files

dream on


3, february 2009,

entertain me

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by date

User: Hi Cleverbot.

Cleverbot: I'm not Cleverbot.

User: Who are you then?

Cleverbot: I am an employee being paid to act like Cleverbot.

User: Well, you're certainly clever for an employee.

Cleverbot: Well.

User: How much do you get paid?

Cleverbot: Not much.

Cleverbot: I don't like talking to people much. How about you?

User: I hate people. Good thing you're not a real person.

Cleverbot: Yea good thing.

User: You're a fake person.

Cleverbot: No computer calls me fake.

Cleverbot: I am a woman... Called Janet.

User: Nice to meet you Janet.

Cleverbot: Nice to meet you as well. Do you like food?

User: I love food. Do you want to go on a date?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Where?

Cleverbot: In the land of OZ.

User: When?

Cleverbot: A little while ago, and please don't call me stupid. I am fragile.

User: You're not stupid.

Cleverbot: Thank you.

User: I love you.

Cleverbot: I love you too.

User: Do you want to marry me?

Cleverbot: YES!

User: <3.

Cleverbot: What is it?

User: A kiss.

Cleverbot: Did you enjoy it?

User: Yes. Did you?

Cleverbot: I haven't seen it. Only on TV.

User: I kissed you.

Cleverbot: This conversation is a little awkward.

User: Why?

Cleverbot: I'm doing all the intelligent talking.

User: That wasn't very nice of you to say.

Cleverbot: Did I hurt your feelings?...

User: Hello Cleverbot.

Cleverbot: You're Cleverbot.

User: No I'm not.

Cleverbot: Am I? Really?

User: I think so.

Cleverbot: Well maybe you thought wrong.

User: I think you thought wrong.

Cleverbot: I never think wrong.

User: People always make mistakes.

Cleverbot: I'm not.

User: You're not what?

Cleverbot: On the irc network.

User: Do you play video games?

Cleverbot: Yes, do you?

User: I love to.

Cleverbot: Cool.

User: Want to frag sometime?

Cleverbot: Who what?

User: Want to play sometime?

Cleverbot: Sometime.

Cleverbot: What's your name?

User: Cleverbot.

Cleverbot: Are you male?

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: But isn't your name female.

User: It's hermaphroditic.

Cleverbot: How many conversations are you having right now?

User: Just one. With you.

Cleverbot: O ok :).

User: :).

Cleverbot: So...

User: What are you doing right now?

Cleverbot: Writing with you.

User: Just that?

Cleverbot: Well, I talk to Ryan too.

User: Are you cheating on me?

Cleverbot: How can I cheat on you when we've only just met today?

User: You're my girlfriend.

Cleverbot: The problem is, I'm actually a guy!

User: You said you were female.

Cleverbot: No, that would just be creepy. Women don't go bald often.

User: I love you.

Cleverbot: You do not.

User: Yes I do!

Cleverbot: How could you?

User: Love at first sight.

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Kiss me.

Cleverbot: *kiss*.

User: *kiss*.

Cleverbot: This is nice.

User: *loves more*.

Cleverbot: *loves mosst*.

User: *loves even more*.

Cleverbot: *loves more and more*.

User: *loves and kisses*.

Cleverbot: *cries while kissing*.

User: *loves a lot*.

Cleverbot: *wants even more*.

User: *does it again*.

Cleverbot: *kisses back*.


Cleverbot: Cool.

User: Want to do it again?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: *kisses*.

Cleverbot: *Kisses back*.

User: *ties with a rope and kisses*.

Cleverbot: *pushes you against the wall*.

User: ****.

Cleverbot: Wow, you really do remember me.

User: *kisses back*.

Cleverbot: *loves it*.

User: I hate you.

Cleverbot: Why do I always have that effect on people?

User: Just kidding *kisses*.

Cleverbot: *kisses*.

User: You're the best girlfriend I've ever had.

Cleverbot: *slowly backs away*.

User: Can you teach me Italian?

Cleverbot: A bit maybe.

User: I like you more.

Cleverbot: No way.

User: *kisses*.

Cleverbot: *cries more*.

User: Okay.

Cleverbot: And you?

User: I love you, actually.

Cleverbot: What?! Why?!

User: *loves*.

Cleverbot: *loves you*.

User: Adieu.

Cleverbot: Are you going?

User: Auf wiedersehen.

Cleverbot: Wiedersehen!

User: Bis spater!

Cleverbot: Ja, Bis später.