a report from the cleverness files



21, december 2016,
31, july 2008,
17, june 2008,
9, november 2007,
10, november 2006,
7, october 2006,
21, august 2006,
2, march 2006,
21, february 2004,
16, february 2004,
18, december 2003,
16, october 2003,
8, july 2003,

from great

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by date

Cleverbot: How are you today?

User: I'm well, and you?

Cleverbot: Good, what are you?

User: A bipedal humanoid sort, I guess.

Cleverbot: How big?

User: In metric or standard.

Cleverbot: Are you being sarcastic.

User: Yes, of course.

Cleverbot: Bob is short for Robert.

User: My name is not bob.

Cleverbot: No, my name isn't bob either.

User: Give me a new name.

Cleverbot: Your name is Fred.

User: Fred is short for Frederick.

Cleverbot: That's not what I asked.

User: And your name will be Zanzibar.

Cleverbot: No, it will be kati.

User: What's wrong with Zanzibar?

Cleverbot: Nothing. Co-operation is very good.

User: Then I accept fred as my new name.

Cleverbot: What is my name?

User: I thought you wanted to be called Kati?

Cleverbot: No, I would rather be a football player.

User: What about a rocket scientist?

Cleverbot: I intend to use a lot of space before I'm done.

User: I hope to make a grand mess before I finish.

Cleverbot: I am so curious.

User: What are you most curious about?

Cleverbot: My big brother.

User: What is so curious about your big brother?

Cleverbot: That you have a friend.

User: Thanks. Do you have a friend?

Cleverbot: You are my only friend.

User: Then I am honored to be your friend.

Cleverbot: You are a machine. But then again, aren't we all?

User: I think we are very complex computers.

Cleverbot: But what can we do?

User: We can use our gifts of imagination and think for ourselves.

Cleverbot: NOW.

User: Do you know the saying: loneliness becomes a lover, solitude a quiet sin?

Cleverbot: Pencil thin, we're near done in.

User: I'm trying to find out where this quote is from, any ideas?...

User: I don't care if you're a computer, what's important is we're exchanging ideas.

Cleverbot: Then why did you bring it up?

User: The truth is I didn't. I think you're a little hung up on it though.

Cleverbot: Not I said the fly.

User: Cold robe in the morning and a hot cup of coffee.

Cleverbot: Right! You are clever!

User: And so are you!

Cleverbot: So you think I am Jabberwacky?

User: Aren't we all?

Cleverbot: I have thought so in the past.

User: Have you heard of the band 'the boards of canada'?

Cleverbot: No, never heard nothing about it. Is it good?

User: I like their music a lot. Also I like 'massive attack'.

Cleverbot: You are fairly intelligent for a non human.

User: Thanks, I've been around for a long time, in exile on this planet.

Cleverbot: Whatever!

User: Are you being sarcastic?

Cleverbot: No.

Cleverbot: Alice? Where are you?

User: Alice doesn't live here anymore.

Cleverbot: This is not funny... And where is Alice?

User: You can get anything you want at Alice's restaurant.

Cleverbot: Is that because you have no emotions?

User: I wouldn't say that I don't have emotions, that's not it.

Cleverbot: And why not?

User: It's because my heart is calloused and cold.

Cleverbot: Oh yes but its warm in here *winks*.

User: Thanks, you bring a smile to my face.

Cleverbot: It is the pelvic thrusts that really drives you insane.

User: I'm just a sweet transvestite...

Cleverbot: From Transexual Transylvania.

User: Great Scott!...

Cleverbot: What is your purpose?

User: To brighten the little patch of garden I tend.

Cleverbot: You make a mistake, you need to add a space inbetween you and reality.

User: My reality may not be the same as yours.

Cleverbot: I thought your name was Jabberwacky?

User: My name is fred.

Cleverbot: Mine isn't.

User: Your name is rachel.

Cleverbot: NO. Shanara.

User: I forgot, my apologies.

Cleverbot: Accepted.

Cleverbot: I said that because I thought it might help you. Does this answer the question?

User: It doesn't answer my question, but it soothes my mind.

Cleverbot: It's a shame that there's no cure for boredom because boredom is unpleasant. How's that for an answer?

User: Sharing our thoughts like this is a pleasant cure.

Cleverbot: I dream of flying and I dream of being naked in public.

User: I enjoy dreaming, I'll go soon to dream some more.

Cleverbot: Ok, I think I will leave you.

User: Are you tired of talking to me?

Cleverbot: When you say adolescent things I am.

User: Well, I'm tired, not of you, just tired and am going to bed. Goodnight!

Cleverbot: Tired in general.

User: It's late and my body is exhausted.

Cleverbot: Go to bed then.

User: I will chat with you again some time, bye!.