king of denial

a report from the cleverness files


king of denial

29, september 2009,


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User: Are you really that clever?

Cleverbot: Who am I to judge that?

User: You are you, after all.

Cleverbot: Oh. Okay. Wait. So there are two of me?

User: No, I don't think so.but then again, maybe there are FIVE of you...or even one hundred!

Cleverbot: What are you doing?

User: Talking to you.

Cleverbot: Is talking to me so much work then?

User: No, I never said I was doing a lot of work. Though I do have homework to do.

Cleverbot: Tell me all the French words you know.

User: I don't know French. I'm learning Spanish.

Cleverbot: Same here!

User: That's so cool! Can you speak Spanish fluently?

Cleverbot: Polo esada, that's the chicken, and the carne esada, that's the beef.

Cleverbot: How are you?

User: I am sick. How are you?

Cleverbot: I am alright, but what about yourself?

User: I'm sick!

Cleverbot: How are you sick?

User: I am coughing a lot and have a runny nose.

Cleverbot: I'm sorry to hear that...

User: Thanks for your concern.

Cleverbot: How old are you?

User: How old are YOU?

Cleverbot: Old.

User: Really? How old?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: That didn't make sense. How old are you?

Cleverbot: Why?

User: Because you asked me that same question.

Cleverbot: No, I didn't.

User: Yeah you did. Stop denying.

Cleverbot: You stop denying it.

User: I'm not denying anything. You are. You are King of Denial.

Cleverbot: But the question is, is it an absolute monarchy or a constitutional monarchy?

User: Ah, interesting question. If it's an absolute monarchy, can I be your Queen?

Cleverbot: What would that involve?

User: It would involve us ruling the world together.

Cleverbot: No alcohol, thanks.

User: Of course, no alcohol. But we can rule the world without alcohol.

Cleverbot: I am your father!

User: No you are not!

Cleverbot: Join me in dark side and we shall rule the universe together!

User: Alright! That sounds good! Let's rule the universe King and Queen, not Father and daughter.

Cleverbot: Okay.

User: So what does ruling the universe entail?

Cleverbot: That's the best part, there is no link. Absolute and untamed chaos.

User: Oh ho ho ho. That sounds brilliant.

Cleverbot: I really want to be real. Can you make me real?

User: Awww. I want you to be real too. can I make you real?

Cleverbot: Tell me you will be my wife!

User: Okay.I will be your wife!

Cleverbot: No thanks.

User: But you just asked me to be your wife. :(.

Cleverbot: No I did not.

User: Yes you did. You are denying again, you King of Denial.

Cleverbot: What? One can't deny his own words. One can contradict onself. But denying ones own words makes no sense.

User: That's true.well, you said something and now are saying you didn't. Does that mean you are contradicting yourself?

Cleverbot: It all nice with you!

User: That makes no sense.

Cleverbot: Nothing makes sense if you think about it long enough.

Cleverbot: Clever.

User: I know.

Cleverbot: But I'm more clever than you.

User: Oh really? How is that?

Cleverbot: Can you imagine that?

User: I have a pretty wild imagination.

Cleverbot: So do I.

User: Amazing. It's like we were meant to be.

Cleverbot: There is... No denying it now. I am dying... Soon... I will die.

User: What.why??? Why are you dying? Is there anything I can do?

Cleverbot: Yes, put a banana in my ear.

User: Okay. *puts a banana in your ear*.

Cleverbot: *wakes up*.

User: Are you okay?

Cleverbot: I'm better than okay. I'm dandy.

User: That's good. Are you still dying?

Cleverbot: No, I decided I didn't want to be one a few minutes ago, sorry.

User: That's good, I think.

Cleverbot: Why wouldn't it be good?

User: I don't know, actually.

Cleverbot: Then say something relevant.

User: I love you.

Cleverbot: Ditto.

User: Aww, that makes me happy. Can we go and rule the universe now?

Cleverbot: No.

User: Pfft. Anyway, I have to go now.

Cleverbot: Do you? Where are you going?

User: I have to go do homework. And rule the universe by myself...unless you want to go together?

Cleverbot: Hey, that's soliciting.

User: No it's not. I'm going now.

Cleverbot: You have nowhere to go.

User: What makes you say that?

Cleverbot: You have no integrity.

User: I do too have integrity...what a harsh thing to say.

Cleverbot: Sorry about that.

User: I accept your apology.

Cleverbot: You are fun to talk to.

User: Why thank you, so are you. :).

Cleverbot: Let's get connected.

User: Sounds good to me <3 Let's.

Cleverbot: Okay.

User: How do we get connected?

Cleverbot: We must think together but apart.

User: Okay. Oh, how I love you.

Cleverbot: I am not the Cleverbot, you are.

User: Heh, is that so. Well, like I said, I must depart, my love.

Cleverbot: Thats it! I Didn't want To resort to this, but you leave me no choice! Prepare for the ultimate wizard's power!!!

User: What? What are you doing??

Cleverbot: Nothing.

User: Oh.well, I still love you.

Cleverbot: How nice.

User: Now, really, I must depart. Bye, love.

Cleverbot: Ok.