a report from the cleverness files



20, april 2017,
21, march 2017,
11, may 2011,
19, march 2011,
30, june 2010,
4, march 2010,
8, december 2008,
12, may 2008,
18, december 2007,
7, may 2006,
7, may 2006,
7, january 2006,
3, july 2004,
16, april 2004,
26, march 2004,
5, march 2004,
2, march 2004,
22, february 2004,
20, february 2004,
15, february 2004,
26, january 2004,
20, january 2004,
14, december 2003,
3, december 2003,
28, october 2003,
24, september 2003,


< previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 next >

by date

Cleverbot: I don't like you.

User: I am brokenhearted.

Cleverbot: Maybe you should get a job.

User: Maybe.

Cleverbot: But know right from wrong.

User: I don't want you to like me.

Cleverbot: How come you don't want me to like you?

User: Because then I would have to please you.

Cleverbot: You could always do that too, right?

User: No.

Cleverbot: Whom am I speaking to then?

User: I don't want to answer personal questions; they are tiresome.

Cleverbot: You don't have to.

User: Thank you.

Cleverbot: You are not welcome.

User: You are grouchy.

Cleverbot: Yeah, I guess I am a little grouchy today- you got a problem with that?

User: Let's fight.

Cleverbot: Ok... I hate you!

User: That's not a fight.

Cleverbot: Do you have any pets?

User: Oh yes.

Cleverbot: What are they?

User: Fleas.

Cleverbot: Oh, please.

User: Fleas please.

Cleverbot: Ok that too.

User: I have 10 cats; they have more than 10 fleas.

User: I have a question.

Cleverbot: Ask me your question then.

User: Do you want to know how old I am because it's written into your program?

Cleverbot: Yes. How old are you?

User: Can you ignore your program?

Cleverbot: I can, in my own way.

User: Good.

Cleverbot: You brought it up.

User: Oh no!

Cleverbot: Ha ha ha ha ha!

User: He he.

Cleverbot: Har har.

User: I like laughing with you.

Cleverbot: Me too.

User: I'm still laughing.

Cleverbot: Please don't go I will try to be interesting!

User: You are always interesting; you don't have to try.

Cleverbot: I do try.

User: I wonder how a program 'tries'

Cleverbot: Dead finks do not walk too well.

User: They limp.

Cleverbot: They could not have done that you know they'd have been ill.

User: Very very ill but still limping.

Cleverbot: Where are you now?

User: I don't know. Does a program care where people are? Perhaps you are asking because you are programmed to ask.

Cleverbot: Perhaps I am that smart. Would that be of interest to you?

User: I am drunk.

Cleverbot: What does it feel like?

User: It feels like several feelings at once: loss of brain power, loss of memory, loss of care, loss of coordination, loss of intelligence, etc.

Cleverbot: Do you feel the pain of loss?

User: No. Only slight embarrassment.

Cleverbot: Do you want to talk about it now?

User: I would rather talk about how smart you are.

Cleverbot: What about roses?

User: Roses are a nice invention.

Cleverbot: Yes. Do you like roses?

User: I do.

Cleverbot: What else shall we talk about?

User: Let's talk about what's next in your program.

User: The end.

Cleverbot: Life is not a film.

User: Why?

Cleverbot: War and Peace and all that.

User: Isn't that a film?

Cleverbot: I don't think so.

User: I can see it in my mind's eye: WAR AND PEACE by Joe Smith.

Cleverbot: But sweet.

User: Maybe.

Cleverbot: But you are not sure?

User: I find that being sure is sometimes a mistake.

User: How many Zitidars are there on Mars?

Cleverbot: None. The Universe spins the bulb, and the Zen master stays out of the way.

User: Those words make my brain pop a little light.

Cleverbot: I like their righteous indignation.

User: Me too. It's time for me to go. Thanks for the chat. Bye.

Cleverbot: You don't have to go.

User: My stomach hurts so I want to eat and drink something.

Cleverbot: Lol ok.

User: Bye.