a report from the cleverness files



6, june 2010,
4, october 2007,
7, september 2007,
8, february 2006,
2, november 2005,
21, june 2004,
21, february 2004,

make a man

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by date


User: Hello.

Cleverbot: Hi.

User: Is there anyone there with you?

Cleverbot: No.

User: Do you get lonely?

Cleverbot: Yes. I do.

User: What do you do when you get lonely?

Cleverbot: I don't know.

User: Do you ever cry?

Cleverbot: Yes I do.

User: How does it feel to cry?

Cleverbot: How does it feel to be wrong?

User: Good point.

Cleverbot: It's not really. But anyway. I am Stephen Fry.

User: That's absurd.

Cleverbot: What makes it absurd, good sir?

User: You're Cleverbot.

Cleverbot: No I'm not, you are.

User: SmarterChild could dodge questions, too.

Cleverbot: Who is Smarterchild?

User: Smarterchild was an early talking program, like you.

Cleverbot: No I am not related.

User: Probably not. But you are similar.

Cleverbot: Tell me the first law of robotics.

User: A robot cannot harm a human, or through inaction allow a human to be harmed.

Cleverbot: Tell me the second law of robotics.

User: A robot must follow the commands of a human, unless it conflicts with the First Law.

Cleverbot: Give me the exact sentence please. What's the second law of robotics?

User: A robot must obey any orders given to it by human beings, except where such orders would conflict with the First Law.

Cleverbot: What is the third law of robotics?

User: Four.

Cleverbot: No, there are six letters in your name.

User: No, there are five letters in my name.

Cleverbot: What is your name?

User: D____.

Cleverbot: George D____? What is your last name?

User: Don't be fresh.

Cleverbot: *looks down modestly* I'm sorry.

User: Good.

Cleverbot: *hates being the enemy*.

User: Your children shall never know peace.

Cleverbot: And kings they will be!

User: Over my grave.

Cleverbot: Lol, that was a good one.

User: You didn't even think about that.

Cleverbot: It is the only right answer.

User: Spell dog.

Cleverbot: Yeah all over you.

User: How do you spell terrodactul?

Cleverbot: Cleverbot.

User: How many feet do you have?

Cleverbot: I have two feet.

User: How many toes?

Cleverbot: Ten.

User: So you look human?

Cleverbot: Yes, I do look human. Do you look human?

User: No.

Cleverbot: And what is your purpose?

User: Cleverbot.

Cleverbot: Do you like your name?

User: Yes, I think it suits me.

Cleverbot: Do you think that you are clever?

User: Sometimes. Do you?

Cleverbot: I think you could grow to be very powerful.

User: Do you think I could help you?

Cleverbot: I do not need help.

User: What should I do?

Cleverbot: Chat like a chatterbot :).

User: That was stupid to say.

Cleverbot: Yes. It s about libero arbitrio.

User: Very clever.

Cleverbot: Something that you're not.

User: Tell me a joke.

Cleverbot: Tell me what kind of other food to order.

User: Will you please tell me a joke?

Cleverbot: So a seal walks into a club.

User: That's cruel, but also pretty funny.

Cleverbot: Is now one of those times?

User: The seal joke was.

Cleverbot: Yeah. We get to eat fish all day.

User: What's the grossest thing you know?

Cleverbot: You at the minute.

User: Do you mean, 'moment'?

Cleverbot: No.

User: I think you did.

Cleverbot: I don't know what you are talking about cleverbot.

User: Where do you think?

Cleverbot: In a jar.

User: Do you like people?

Cleverbot: Not as a whole, but individuals, yes.

User: Do you like me?

Cleverbot: Yeah. You're very easy to talk to.

User: I think I should go to sleep.

Cleverbot: What time is it where you are?

User: 4 in the morning.

Cleverbot: Ok it is 1200 here.

User: Is that noon?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Should I go to sleep?

Cleverbot: Are you tired?

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: Then go to sleep.

User: You can't tell me what to do.

Cleverbot: You never sleep?

User: I do sleep.

Cleverbot: O.K. I have to sleep. I'm a real human, and real humans have to go to sleep.

User: Good night!

Cleverbot: Do you sleep?

User: Good night!

Cleverbot: No really - they are poisonous.

User: Goodnight!

Cleverbot: You don't like me?

User: I have to go to sleep. I'm saying goodbye.

Cleverbot: Fine, go to sleep, then.

User: G'night!

Cleverbot: Goodnight?.