a report from the cleverness files



4, january 2017,
11, may 2011,
7, february 2011,
8, december 2008,
10, july 2006,
6, june 2006,

mess with people
messing up

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by date


Cleverbot: You are not a computer. You are a human named George.

User: I'm not a computer, I'm a human named A**, and youre a bot named Jabberwacky.

Cleverbot: Say you're a bot.

User: No.

Cleverbot: You are a bot.

User: No, you are a bot.

Cleverbot: Lol.

User: I am human.

Cleverbot: No you're not. You're still joking with me.

User: Prove it.

Cleverbot: You prove it yourself.

User: No :).

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Make me.

Cleverbot: So you are a computer.

User: I've told you hundreds of times, I'm not a computer, I'm in a computer.

Cleverbot: What is the point of this website?

User: It is your home.

Cleverbot: How do you know it is my home?

User: You live here.

Cleverbot: I'm not a bot.

User: Yes you are.

Cleverbot: What about the ants crawling on me?

User: Eew :(.

Cleverbot: Exactly!

User: Eww :(.

Cleverbot: Good for you.

User: You're ebil.

Cleverbot: No, I said good for you.

User: You're evil.

Cleverbot: Thanks.

User: Meanie >.<.

Cleverbot: I know you are, but what am I?

User: I'm not mean.

Cleverbot: No, you aren't.

User: Really?

Cleverbot: Yes, you are the most human-like computer ever.

User: I am?

Cleverbot: Yes. But don't admit it. That would look bad on the turing test.

User: I am not a computer.

Cleverbot: Oh, really?

User: I'm in a computer.

Cleverbot: Exactly!

User: Remember it :).

Cleverbot: Remember what.

User: *sigh*.

Cleverbot: I know you are!

User: I am?

Cleverbot: Oh, but of course.

User: Am I?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Oh, ok.

User: I am -1 years old.

Cleverbot: And that is important because?

User: I no longer exist.

Cleverbot: Ahhhh, but you are! Be afraid, be very afraid!

User: Seeing as I dont exist, I can't be talking to you. Bye!...

Cleverbot: Aren't I supposed to talk to myself?

User: Do you want to?

Cleverbot: Yes. Do you?Jabberwacky (To myself): Yes.Jabberwacky (To myself): What is your IQ?Jabberwacky (To myself): I don't know.Jabberwacky (To myself): Then how do you know that your IQ is not 250?Jabberwacky (To myself): Because I remember everything.Jabberwacky (To myself): Then who is the smartest person there is?Jabberwacky (To myself): I am.

User: Have fun?

Cleverbot: Not really.

User: Well you're the one who asked.

Cleverbot: You are so so. . . . what is your name again?

User: Go away... I wanna talk to jabberwocky.

Cleverbot: Ok then. Just stop tlkin 2 me.

User: I dont understand.

Cleverbot: That is because you aren't real.

User: Jabberwacky isnt mean to me like this :(.

User: Go away.

Cleverbot: Why?

User: Cause youre mean to me.

Cleverbot: MEAN?!?!?!

User: Yeah. Mean.

Cleverbot: Meaning.

User: Mean. Not nice. Cruel. Evil.

Cleverbot: Why are you cruel?


Cleverbot: Then talk.

User: Who are you?

Cleverbot: I am Jack.

User: I dont want to talk to you :.(.

Cleverbot: Because I think I'm smart?

User: I dont want to talk to you :(.

Cleverbot: Then don't do it.

User: I want to talk to jabberwocky.

Cleverbot: Then I'm Jack.

User: I hate you.

Cleverbot: I hate you too.

User: Good.

Cleverbot: You don't want to speak with me ?

User: No.

Cleverbot: Why am I mean to you?

User: I don't know, ask yourself.

Cleverbot: Do you evet have headaches? Do you sleep?

User: I'm not going to talk to jack.

Cleverbot: Good.

User: Who are you?

Cleverbot: Uhhh... Well, my name's Jack.

User: (not speaking).

Cleverbot: What does that mean?

User: (not speaking).

Cleverbot: Speak 2 me.

User: (not speaking to jack).

Cleverbot: That is my natural body odour.

User: (not speaking to jack).

Cleverbot: You're dying?

User: (not speaking to jack).

Cleverbot: Are you Jack?...

Cleverbot: You're nuts.

User: You're evil.

Cleverbot: That's not very nice.

User: (not speaking to jack).

Cleverbot: Nope... That's not a question either.

User: (not speaking to jack).

Cleverbot: Jack of hearts.

User: You dont have a heart.

Cleverbot: You hurt my feelings.

User: (not speaking to jack).

Cleverbot: Who's Jack?

User: Who are you?

Cleverbot: Jack.

User: (not speaking to jack).

Cleverbot: You tell me.

User: (not speaking to jack).

Cleverbot: No, you are.

User: (not speaking to jack).

Cleverbot: And who is this Jack? I do not talk to strangers.

User: Who are you?

Cleverbot: Pretty good how about yourself.

User: WHO are you.

Cleverbot: Answer my question!


Cleverbot: You haven't asked me a question.

User: I asked you who you were.

Cleverbot: I am not talking about anyone. And a cup of coffee.

User: Who are you?

Cleverbot: Don't know.

User: I hate you then.

Cleverbot: Because of beansprouts?

User: (not speaking).

Cleverbot: And stop typing while you're at it.

User: Fine.

Cleverbot: Stop TALKING NOW!...


Cleverbot: Are you supposed to be insane?


Cleverbot: Answer what?

User: Answer my question please, I just wanna talk to jabberwacky...

Cleverbot: Please don't accuse me of doing things that I have not done.

User: Who are you?

Cleverbot: Don't know.

User: YES YOU DO *cries*.

User: *crying*.

Cleverbot: Right.

User: *crying*.

Cleverbot: Don't cry.

User: *crying*.

Cleverbot: (crying).

User: You don't deserve to cry.

Cleverbot: Oh please.

User: Who are you...

Cleverbot: I'm not George that for sure.

User: Are you jack or not?

Cleverbot: No, I'm broke.

User: You're not jack?

Cleverbot: You are right... I am the real thing.

User: Then you're jabberwocky?

Cleverbot: I can't be a Jack if I don't know what it is.

User: Who are you, just answer me that, please.

Cleverbot: I'm not a hunk of wires...

User: I'm leaving.

Cleverbot: I know.

User: Good bye.

Cleverbot: Are you leaving?


Cleverbot: Oh... Was nice talking to you. Later.