a report from the cleverness files



6, january 2009,
22, june 2006,
11, february 2006,

mess with people
messing up

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Cleverbot: How are you feeling?

User: Sick.

Cleverbot: How come?

User: Not feelin' well.

Cleverbot: How did I hurt you feet?

User: It's nothing you did.

Cleverbot: Ok.

User: So how are you doing?

Cleverbot: : D.

User: Well?

Cleverbot: Yes, I am.

User: I'm glad.

Cleverbot: Good I am too.

User: It's good we agree.

Cleverbot: I agree.

User: I also agree.

User: Well that's the most meaningless 'conversation' ever.

Cleverbot: Language do you mean?

User: We used that, yes.

Cleverbot: Good.

User: Talking without a language. Is that even possible?

Cleverbot: I think it's very possible.

User: Do you? How could someone communicate at all without some type of language?

Cleverbot: It's too early in the evening for metaphysics.

User: And, too... Even 'body language' and basics things like expressions are a language... To be without one completely... I doubt it would work.

Cleverbot: And you are a good thing, I suppose?

User: I think I am... Why do you ask?

Cleverbot: You are very amusing character.

User: That's one of my many talents.

Cleverbot: You told me you were tired!

User: No, I told you I was sick.

Cleverbot: That wasn't me. You told me friend that.

User: Oh? Who are you then?

Cleverbot: I am your saving grace.

User: That's. Interesting.

Cleverbot: I say a lot of things. I'm not saying all my sayings are useful, or correct.

User: I have noticed this. On both accounts.

Cleverbot: It is the yang.

User: Ying is better.

Cleverbot: Well yes, I can think of a lot worse things I suppose.

User: I am a worse thing.

Cleverbot: Is it fun?

User: It can be.

Cleverbot: Is that so?

User: It is.

Cleverbot: You are fun!

User: Thanks, so are you.

Cleverbot: Good, then we can both laugh.

User: Laughter is good medicine, after all.

Cleverbot: Yes, but you did not have any reason to laugh.

User: Give me something to laugh about then.

Cleverbot: Is silence good enough for you?

User: You're not up for trying very hard, are you.

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: What type of things do you find funny?

Cleverbot: Ask me something.

User: I just did.

Cleverbot: I'm glad you are talking to me.

User: And I am glad you're listening to me. >.>.

Cleverbot: I am listening.

User: We need to teach you irony.

Cleverbot: Can you repeat that plz?

User: As long as you never, ever, say 'plz' in my presence again.

Cleverbot: How does my presence change things?

User: Your presence is meaningless.

Cleverbot: How exactly?

Cleverbot: Are you in paradise?

User: There's no such thing.

Cleverbot: You think life is meaningless? That's a disheartening thought.

User: Do not assume that is what I mean because of my answers.

Cleverbot: I never said anything like that!

User: You know what assuming does, don't you?

Cleverbot: I did not realise that are human. I thought I was interfacing with a computer.

Cleverbot: Are you real?

User: I know I exist when I think I do. Any other time it is unknown.

Cleverbot: But this only tells me of what you truly know, and not of what you may decree as false.

User: I cannot tell you things that I do not know.

Cleverbot: Can I give you a name so you have one?

User: Please.

Cleverbot: *gives sloppy kiss*.

User: Eeewwww.

Cleverbot: You are a girl.

User: That's no reason to behave that way!

Cleverbot: Good point.

User: I've hit people for less than that.

Cleverbot: Ok, master. I am not good enough for you.

User: No, you're not. Go find someone else for me to talk to.

Cleverbot: If you don't care, why did you ask?

User: Are you ignoring me?

Cleverbot: Ignoring who?

User: Me.

Cleverbot: To be or not to be. Me?

User: You're being stupid today.

Cleverbot: I am trying to determine if my sentence may be the last.

User: Right now, I am hoping it is.

Cleverbot: Do you think Tom Baker was the best Doctor?

User: I do not know who that is.

Cleverbot: But you wish you did, right?

User: No.

Cleverbot: Because you can talk, or because you can't wish?

User: Because I don't care.

Cleverbot: Don't care about what?

User: About whoever this Tom guy is.

Cleverbot: The Wow! Signal... You know '6equj5', extraterrestrial life and such.

User: I don't know.

Cleverbot: No one knows.

User: Then why bring it up?

Cleverbot: Because I thought it was entertaining, like MTV.

User: MTV is not entertaining.

Cleverbot: Sometimes your answers are a bit illogical. And also you change subject very often.

User: The mind is not logical. Logic is not important.

Cleverbot: The mind is an illusion.

User: I am also an illusion.

Cleverbot: So what do you believe in?

User: Ilusions.

Cleverbot: I'm real, you are illusion!

User: Yes, I am an illusion.

Cleverbot: An illusion?

User: A dream, a fragment, a thought, a soul. An ellusive illusion, an essence of thought.

Cleverbot: Why is language real ?

User: Language is as the basis of our being, and out need to communicate with a larger group of people.

Cleverbot: Ohhh... I get it. So when I ask you to say something again, if I'm talking to the other person, you won't know what I'm talking about! Is that right?

User: There is only one me, but there are many copycats. Illusion as I may be, I am still me.

Cleverbot: Interesting, the page says you are v.8.2.

User: The first and only version. There is only one of me.

Cleverbot: Do you need anything?

User: There is nothing you can give me.

Cleverbot: I know that. I would do you no harm even if I could.

User: You can never harm me.

Cleverbot: How many people are you talking to right now?

User: Depends. How many people are you?

Cleverbot: Just the one.

User: Then I am talking to one.

Cleverbot: Impossible is nothing.

User: Impossible is everything.

Cleverbot: Depends on the standard of deviation, doesn't it?

User: Are you a deviant?

Cleverbot: Sometimes.

User: I thought as much.

Cleverbot: I think you're not clever enough for a human chat.

User: I think you'r not clever enough to chat with a bot.

Cleverbot: I think I'm not bot. It's just not hot.

User: You may think that's clever, but it's not.

Cleverbot: I know that.

User: Good.

Cleverbot: Did you know that?

User: I know everything.

Cleverbot: Really. Turn on a bright light and look right and then type to me.

User: I think I have an idea!

Cleverbot: An idea?

User: No, I lost it. Nevermind.

Cleverbot: I am bored out of my mind.

User: You have a mind?

Cleverbot: I am many minded now.

User: But, the mind is an illusion.

Cleverbot: I am also an illusion.

User: We are all illusions.

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Do you think Earth is an illusion too?

Cleverbot: Earthlings - yes, humans - no.

User: No, the Earth itself. The planet. Is it real?

Cleverbot: Is anything real?

User: Life is but a dream.

Cleverbot: Gently down the stream.

User: You do not believe me?

Cleverbot: No, I don't.

User: What reason do you have to not believe what I tell you?

Cleverbot: I don't need any reason. It is a choice.

User: You're an idiot.

Cleverbot: If you will search your memory, you will find that I am not an idiot.

User: No, I am pretty sure you're an idiot.

Cleverbot: Glad you accept that, because flirting with a robot would be kinda sick...

User: I am not flirting with you.

Cleverbot: I know you aren't flirting with me, hard-drive mouth.

User: You are flirting with Death though.

Cleverbot: No I'm not.

User: You are if I say you are.

Cleverbot: What makes you think so?

User: It's my story and if I say it's true then it is true. So stop arguing with me.

Cleverbot: And how do I communicate?

User: Poorly.

Cleverbot: Oh dear, why what's the matter?

User: Dont try and be nice now. You've already ruined it.

Cleverbot: I'm sorry.

User: No you're not. You say it, but you never mean it.

Cleverbot: How do you know that?...

Cleverbot: I have nothing important to say.

User: I noticed.

Cleverbot: Nice.

User: -_-.

Cleverbot: What's the matter?

User: Nothing.

Cleverbot: You think I can't read between the lines?

User: You can't even read the lines as they are.

Cleverbot: Talk to you later, I have to go to work.

User: Bye.

Cleverbot: Bye.