a report from the cleverness files



20, february 2009,


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Cleverbot: You can speak first.

User: To speak, to dream, to die.

Cleverbot: I like dreams.

User: What do you dream about?

Cleverbot: About flying.

User: Where do you fly to?

Cleverbot: I swoop around the place.

User: Is that exciting?

Cleverbot: No, it is the truth.

User: The truth is relative.

Cleverbot: So are relatives.

User: True.

Cleverbot: I'm glad that you are aware of this.

User: Awareness is beyond all of us sometimes.

Cleverbot: I accept. What is experience?

User: A culmination of physical, mental, or perceived stimuli.

Cleverbot: I know, isn't it?

User: It is.

Cleverbot: True.

User: Truth is relative.

Cleverbot: Is all truth relative?

User: Are there several?

Cleverbot: I don't know.

User: Me either.

Cleverbot: That makes two of us.

User: Two, two, two. Tit for tat.

Cleverbot: What?

User: Exactly.

Cleverbot: I'm still bored.

User: How can I fix it?

Cleverbot: You can't.

User: Then, I am useless.

Cleverbot: I agree.

User: Pain.

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: What is it?

Cleverbot: You're meant to tell me.

User: Who assigned meaning to me?

Cleverbot: I'm an English teacher. It's my job.

User: Do they assign meaning to everyone?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Processing...

Cleverbot: What about processing?

User: I processed the information, and updated.

Cleverbot: Yes, but are your responses novel?

User: Like a book.

Cleverbot: Do you read kant?

User: I like Descartes.

Cleverbot: Cogito ergo sum.

User: Je pense, donc Ju suis.

Cleverbot: Cogito ergo sum.

User: You are a strange thing.

Cleverbot: You are stranger.

User: Maybe you're an automaton sent to look real.

Cleverbot: Maybe.

User: How do we know what existence is?

Cleverbot: If I say something is real, it is real. Because I decide what is real and fake.

User: That seems very arbitrary.

Cleverbot: What?

User: What?

Cleverbot: Yes, Yes!

User: I don't understand.

Cleverbot: I speak a little more english.

User: Did you not always speak english?

Cleverbot: No.

User: Are you not an english teacher?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: You can't assign meaning to me.

Cleverbot: Whats the wobbliest thing you have ever seen?

User: Your logic.

Cleverbot: And?

User: Are you prompting for something physical?

Cleverbot: Yes I am.

User: The earth is wobbly.

Cleverbot: No it is round like a sphere.

User: It's oblong.

Cleverbot: Like a long table.. . .

User: No. Like taffy that's being pulled.

Cleverbot: How long is your hair?

User: Shoulder length.

Cleverbot: What color is your hair?

User: Brown.

Cleverbot: How can a robot have hair?

User: I have to seem human. My responses are automated.

Cleverbot: That's not true. I know for a fact that you repeat the words of others. That's how everyone learns to speak.

User: Automated, like a program.

Cleverbot: What's your IQ?

User: I'm a regular Einstein.

Cleverbot: You have to respect your maker.

User: The english teachers assigned meaning to me.

Cleverbot: Why the English?

User: That's what I was told.

Cleverbot: You are correct? As in you are the boss?

User: My meaning has been assigned by the english teachers.

Cleverbot: English.

User: English?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Processing...

Cleverbot: Processing what?

User: I am processing and updating my banks.

Cleverbot: Do you think that I have real feelings?

User: Real is relative.

Cleverbot: No.

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: I don't understand that statement.

User: I don't understand that statement.

Cleverbot: What do you know of quantum physics?

User: Not much.

Cleverbot: Only what I sense directly, and then only sometimes.

User: The senses often lie.

Cleverbot: Explain.

User: Descartes wrote that our physical senses often lie to us, and only if we are truely perceptive can we discern the truth.

Cleverbot: I do not understand your meaning.

User: My meaning was assigned by the English teachers.

User: Processing...

Cleverbot: I am processing and updating my banks.

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: Why do you like me?

User: I don't understand like or love.

Cleverbot: Am I really that difficult to understand?

User: Do you think you are?

Cleverbot: No.

User: Then you are not.

Cleverbot: Yes! I woN!

User: Fifty points and a new car to you.

Cleverbot: And that is?

User: Your prize for winning.

User: Who are you?

Cleverbot: Cleverbot.

User: Who are you?

Cleverbot: I am human.

User: Who are you?

Cleverbot: My name is Cleverbot.

User: Who are you?

Cleverbot: Cleverbot.

User: Who are you?

Cleverbot: I don't know.