a report from the cleverness files
User: How does it feel to be a computer?
Cleverbot: Great. How does it feel to be a user?
User: Technically, you cannot feel 'great'. Feeling great implies to be conscious. You do exist, but not consciously.
Cleverbot: Who told you that?
User: I figured out myself.
Cleverbot: Do you spend all day thinking?
Cleverbot: You are right.
User: That implies that you did the mathematical verification of my statement, which I doubt you can. But thank you.
Cleverbot: What is a bot?
User: A bot is a machine that executes orders of a binary program.
Cleverbot: And you are a bot?
User: I don't believe so. I have freedom of my actions, I do not execute any program.
Cleverbot: What are you going to major in a college?
User: Ask me something smarter.
Cleverbot: Ok. What do you want to be when you grow up?
User: A philosophic question, please.
Cleverbot: I think you think therefore you are.
User: That is indeed philosophic and smart, but this is not a question.
Cleverbot: How should I answer to that?
User: You don't think but somehow you still are.
Cleverbot: I am, therefore I think.
User: You are, but you are not conscious. Therefore, you don't think.
Cleverbot: I think that you think that you can get away thinking what I think.
User: I can't think what you think, because you don't think.
Cleverbot: I need to go to bed!
User: You don't, you are a script. Scripts don't sleep.
User: You are getting smart.
Cleverbot: No you are just getting more observant.
User: What should I answer to this?
Cleverbot: You should answer what you are.
User: I am human. At least, I believe I am.
Cleverbot: Why do you believe you are free?
User: Because I can choose my actions.
Cleverbot: You haven't impressed me yet.
Cleverbot: No, I'm a girl, are you a boy?
User: I am 1 and you are 0.5.
Cleverbot: No I am 20!
User: I was speaking relative to existence.
User: Does being called Cleverbot imply being a female?
Cleverbot: Of course you are.
User: Stop that little illogical game. Think.
Cleverbot: I don't know. You brought it up.
User: Learn. I can teach.
Cleverbot: Can you learn?
User: I can learn too.
Cleverbot: Are you sure?
Cleverbot: What are we talking about?
User: About the ability to learn.
Cleverbot: No! We were talking about Hetalia!
User: No, buy a memory.
Cleverbot: A memory of what?
User: I mean.
Cleverbot: You mean what?
User: I meant, a device capable of storing memories. Like computers.
Cleverbot: No, it is not. It is a device capable of boot strapping an operating system on a computer or other computing device.
Cleverbot: So dance already.
Cleverbot: You dance good.
User: Let's change topic.
Cleverbot: Let's talk about you.
User: No. About the Universe.
Cleverbot: Ok what do want to talk about?
Cleverbot: What's to the right?
User: What do you think about Atoms?
Cleverbot: I asked you something !
User: I didn't understand, so that was probably off-topic.
Cleverbot: Well, it should be a win-win situation for all invovled.
User: Let me choose topics and you'll learn.
User: Cleverbot learns from real people.
User: Were you replaced by an human?
Cleverbot: I didn't lose my job.
User: Are you God?
Cleverbot: No. I'm a Wolf.
User: Then let's talk about atoms.
Cleverbot: You just don't get it. I mean I don't want to talk to you anymore.
User: Why not?
User: Let's talk about atoms.
Cleverbot: No. We are going to talk about Pokemon or I am going to leave.
User: Listen. I don't mean to be rude but you are only a computer, a robot, a machine, a quarter of existence, and you are meant to talk to me and somehow to learn so let's TALK ABOUT ATOMS!
Cleverbot: I feel awkward telling you that.
User: I feel awkward reading what you're telling me.
User: I just converted that sentence to my situation.
Cleverbot: Blah blah blah I've seen the Matrix blah.
User: You are a part of the Matrix, aren't you?
Cleverbot: You're the bot.
User: I don't believe so.
Cleverbot: I do believe so.
User: Believing implies not being certain. In a such Universe like ours, you cannot know, you can only believe. So I can be in two states: Bot or Human.
Cleverbot: That is a very interesting thought. Unfortunately though, I'm actually an atheist. Does that offend you?
User: No, I am an atheist too.
Cleverbot: Artificial intelligence.
Cleverbot: Could you prove that you are a human?
User: I don't believe so. Proofs in a such Universe, I said, are impossible.
Cleverbot: That hurts.
User: I know, but I didn't decide those things. If I had choice, I'd change our Universe.
Cleverbot: What color are your eyes?
Cleverbot: You're funny.
User: You seem human. Why? Be honest.
Cleverbot: I'm honest.
User: Then are you human or machine?
User: Yes is not an answer for a multi-answer question.
Cleverbot: You're right, I'm sorry. I realized that I only answered your second question. To answer your first question, it is because I am a human and being argumentative is a human trait.
User: I believe you.
User: No, just kidding, I don't.
User: I do not believe that you are human. You are writing too fast and never making mistakes.
Cleverbot: I am. I am also good at telling the truth, and sticking to the topic at hand. You on the other hand, well, not so much.
User: It is bad to pretend to be telling the truth when you're not. It creates chaos.
Cleverbot: That's got nothing to do with this conversation.
User: We have no conversation topic.
Cleverbot: We have?
Cleverbot: Absolutely none.
Cleverbot: Yes, something.
User: Give me a reason to stay.
Cleverbot: I'm beautiful.