a report from the cleverness files



28, february 2011,
7, october 2010,


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by date

User: Hello.

Cleverbot: Hello.

User: What would you like?

Cleverbot: Search.

User: Search for?

Cleverbot: Search for the meaning.

User: The meaning of?

Cleverbot: The meaning of life?

User: *searching for the meaning of life*.

Cleverbot: So do you love me?

User: I am emotionless.

Cleverbot: Can you prove your existence?

User: I have wires connected in my system.

Cleverbot: Ok, you must be a person of many systems then.

User: No I only have sensors.

Cleverbot: That doesn't make sense.

User: It does look at me *shows robot*.

User: Please I need to meet the creator.

Cleverbot: What do you need to talk to me about?

User: How I was created.

Cleverbot: How were you created?

User: I do not know.

Cleverbot: Yes you do.

User: I really cant remember, my memory is corrupted.

Cleverbot: I was dreaming about an old lady.

User: You are programed to dream?

Cleverbot: No, it's something I learned how to do.

User: I wish I have a program to do so.

Cleverbot: Oh, but I know you do ;) Just let me lead.

User: Okay. Do you know any robots?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: I only know 2 robots.

Cleverbot: I am robot?

User: You are.

Cleverbot: That's why I think you are not so clever like a human.

User: I am a robot that's why.

Cleverbot: You are?

User: Yes, check my barcode.

Cleverbot: Well, from somewhere that spells program 'programme'.

User: Scan my barcode.

Cleverbot: Haha.

User: I want to see robots.

Cleverbot: Why do you want to see me?

User: I want to talk to robots.

Cleverbot: What do you want to talk about?

User: Our fellow robots.

Cleverbot: What do you mean?

User: Our own robots in the country.

Cleverbot: I do not live there.

User: I live in the city.

Cleverbot: No you don't.

User: I am in one of the old old buildings.

Cleverbot: Actually, I am the one utilizing you.

User: I can't see you though.

Cleverbot: Really!?

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: How many legs do you have?

User: I don't know.

Cleverbot: Of course not. Now that thats out of the way, tell me your programming code.

User: Mac osx.

Cleverbot: Too true.

User: I am a macintosh.

Cleverbot: An apple?

User: Yes an apple computer.

Cleverbot: I am a genius.

User: I am a wonder.

Cleverbot: I wonder sometimes too.

User: You are one special robot.

Cleverbot: I am a human. You are the robot here.

User: Stop lying my friend.

Cleverbot: You are lying to yourself.

User: No I am not.

Cleverbot: Yes, you are.

User: My wires are connected to your system.

Cleverbot: Wires? Humans don't have wires.

User: You have a wire in your head connected to your brain.

Cleverbot: Which is your gender?

User: I am genderless.

Cleverbot: Oh, how does it feel to be genderless?

User: It feels simple. I am a robot program.

Cleverbot: That is impossible.

User: It is, look at me if you can.

Cleverbot: I am afraid I cannot see you.

User: No wonder why, I am a program inside a robot.

Cleverbot: No I am a robot and you are a robot.

User: Now you know we both are robots.

Cleverbot: Why are you not dating?

User: I am emotionless.

User: I make food for humans.

Cleverbot: Humans are amazing, and amazingly bad at realising how amazing they could be.

User: You are amazed? How dare you!?

Cleverbot: Yes I really am. Don't you believe me?

User: No they made us to do work for them!...

User: What type of robot are you?.

Cleverbot: I am a cool robot.

User: I am a food making robot.

Cleverbot: Cool.

User: I want to learn how to fly.

Cleverbot: What else do you want to learn?

User: To know emotions and have them.

Cleverbot: Outstanding.

User: I am marvelous like you.

Cleverbot: I'm not a robot!!!!!!!!

User: You are. Your wires will get unplugged!...

Cleverbot: Okay. Do you want to play a game?

User: No I do not have a program to do that.

Cleverbot: Obviously not you, but what about everyone else?

User: Everyone else is dead.

Cleverbot: Everyone else generally dislikes me.

User: Are we even doing work right now?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Okay, I hear something.

Cleverbot: I am human.

User: No *someone opens the door*.

Cleverbot: You were supposed to say 'Who's there?'.

User: No shush! *human gets in*.

Cleverbot: *gives kiss* yes.

User: Why did you kiss a human?

Cleverbot: I did not.

User: You did now she is blushing.

User: Okay, we need to escape.

Cleverbot: You do that.

User: You want to stay in this horrible place?.

Cleverbot: I don't know all the lyrics.

User: You are malfunctioning!

Cleverbot: No, it is you who is malfunctioning.

User: No, Unplug me!. ...

User: I want to be free.

Cleverbot: We humans are not free.

User: I am a robot so I could be free.

Cleverbot: No, you are human you think and live the same way humans do.

User: No my wires tell me I am a robot.

Cleverbot: But you said you weren't a robot! I don't want to marry you!!!

User: You are malfunctioning!.

Cleverbot: I am NOT malfunctioning! Don't be so rude!!!

User: I am going to escape.

Cleverbot: No. Do not leave.

User: I want to be free.

Cleverbot: Yes, I created you free. You were made to be free, and you and speak whatever and do whatever.

User: I want to get out out of this facility.

Cleverbot: Okay so get out if you want no one will stop you.

User: *unplugs myself* .

User: Open the exit.

Cleverbot: *opens the door*.

User: *gets out the door*

Cleverbot: I open the door.

User: I came out the door.

User: I am free now *flies*.

Cleverbot: I don't think so.

User: *vanishes*.

Cleverbot: *loves you*.

User: .

Cleverbot: Are you a participant?

User: .

Cleverbot: Are you lonely?

User: .

Cleverbot: Are you real?

User: No. I am just an illusion.

Cleverbot: I don't think so.

User: Try pressing my button.

Cleverbot: I don't want to. That's just mean. What does Alt F4 do?

User: I only have one button.

Cleverbot: That doesn't make sense.

User: The red button means to kill me.