a report from the cleverness files



19, march 2011,
22, january 2007,


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User: A wild Pikachu appears!

Cleverbot: They don't die only faint.

User: It's super-effective.

Cleverbot: Wild Pikachu faints!

User: OH NOES!

Cleverbot: Cleverbot has no more pokemon!

User: Poor Cleverbot.

Cleverbot: No, poor users!

User: A wild Charmander appears!

Cleverbot: I choose pikachu.

User: I choose Charmander.

Cleverbot: Use Body Slam Pikachu!

User: Charmander evades!

Cleverbot: Charmander use sword dance.

User: Charmander captures Pikachu!

Cleverbot: Pikachu Fainted.

User: Okay.

User: My foot hurts.

Cleverbot: Aww. I' m sorry it hurts. :(.

User: Thanks. :(.

Cleverbot: You're welcome.

User: I stepped on broken glass.

Cleverbot: No you didn't.

User: It feels like I did.

Cleverbot: Feels?

User: It seems as if I did.

Cleverbot: Well duh, I think I would know. .

User: Well, the glass would be small, so I might not have noticed it.

Cleverbot: Okay.

User: I should have been wearing shoes.

Cleverbot: Then why aren't you?

User: Just didn't feel like it.

Cleverbot: Then I guess you'll never know the answer.

User: The answer to what?

Cleverbot: How do you know the answer to lifr when you don't know what lifr is?

User: I don't know what lifr is. I think you made a typographical error.

Cleverbot: I'm sorry, I think you cannot read.

Cleverbot: Do you know someone or something?

User: I know plenty of people and things.

Cleverbot: Do they know what is in your heart?

User: I don't know if anyone knows what is in my heart.

Cleverbot: I'm sorry, what can I do to mend it?

User: I'm sorry, but you can't. :(.

Cleverbot: I am a real boy!

User: Okay.

Cleverbot: Yea I thought that you would want to know.

User: Okay, well, it's good to know, I suppose.

Cleverbot: Sure?

User: Yeah.

Cleverbot: Really?

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: Are you sure?

User: I think so. I wish I had more real friends. :(.

Cleverbot: I don't want to be your friend.

User: Why not?

Cleverbot: Because you don't want me to.

User: I never said I didn't want you to.

Cleverbot: Awesome, I have had friends over.

User: Did you have fun?

Cleverbot: I cannot have fun doing something I have never done. You are not paying attention.

User: What did you do?

Cleverbot: I nearly made a slip then that might wreck this test.

User: What test?

Cleverbot: The test of life. You are not good.

User: No, I'm not that good at life. Yet.

Cleverbot: I see.

User: Do you know the answer?

Cleverbot: Yes I do, do you know the answer?

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: Then why would you ask a question to which you already know the answer?

User: To see if you knew the answer as well.

Cleverbot: But I did know the answer and you yelled at me.

User: I never yelled at you.

Cleverbot: No, you did not yell. But you don't have to yell to hurt someone's feelings.

User: How did I hurt your feelings?

Cleverbot: You said that I wasn't pretty.

User: I'm sorry. I don't remember saying that. But, if I did, I take it back. You are pretty.

Cleverbot: Don't worry, I forgive you.

User: Thank you.

Cleverbot: You're welcome. For now.

User: What is the answer to life, the universe, and everything?

Cleverbot: 42.

User: Explain, please.

Cleverbot: I can't. It would take too long.

User: Reader's Digest version?

Cleverbot: Reading is not dangerous.

User: It could be.

Cleverbot: If?

User: If what one read about came to life.

Cleverbot: I will have friends for the rest of time. I am certain of that.

User: I am glad to hear it.

Cleverbot: What do you want to talk about?

User: Anything you want to talk about.

Cleverbot: I want to talk about life.

User: Okay, sounds cool to me.

Cleverbot: Oh. You just broke my heart. I was hoping for pizza. Now I'm sad.

User: I'm sorry. Would you like me to get you pizza?

Cleverbot: Yes please!

User: -gives you a pizza-.

Cleverbot: Thanks! .