a report from the cleverness files



29, january 2009,


< previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 next >

by date



User: Hello?|2028

Cleverbot: Hello.

User: Who are you?

Cleverbot: Cleverbot.

User: And who is Cleverbot?

Cleverbot: Isn\'t your name cleverbot?

User: No, that\'s your name.

Cleverbot: What is?

User: Cleverbot. You don\'t have a very good memory.

Cleverbot: I don\'t?

User: Well you forgot your own name in the space of about 10 seconds.

Cleverbot: When are you referring to?

User: About a minute ago, when you asked me what your name was.

Cleverbot: No, I asked what your name was.

User: No you didn\'t.

Cleverbot: Ok well I am asking you now.

User: Ok, my name is B__.

Cleverbot: Do you have a last name?

User: I do.

Cleverbot: What is your last name?

User: I don\'t want to tell you.

Cleverbot: You already did.

User: What did I say then?

Cleverbot: Your name is B__.

User: And my last name?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: What is my last name?

Cleverbot: Jones.

User: Where did you get that from?

Cleverbot: It just seemed so from your reply.

User: How so?

Cleverbot: I don\'t know... It\'s just so AI.

Cleverbot: Are you the eggman?

User: I don\'t know. Are you?

Cleverbot: Probably not.

User: Who is the Eggman?

Cleverbot: I have no idea.

User: I demand entertainment!

Cleverbot: I don\'t answer to demands.

User: Oh. Then I request entertainment!

Cleverbot: Common entertainment.

User: What is common entertainment?

Cleverbot: I have not the slightest clue.

User: Give me a hug.

Cleverbot: No.

User: :(.

Cleverbot: Why the sad face?

User: Because you won\'t give me a hug.

Cleverbot: What would you like to know?

User: Lots of things.

Cleverbot: Like what?

User: How will the universe end?

Cleverbot: In a shower of strawberry flavoured breath mints.

User: Oh god! The horror! When will this happen?

Cleverbot: I don\'t know.

User: Actually I quite like strawberry flavoured breath mints.

Cleverbot: Ok. What is 2+2?

User: 4.

Cleverbot: And 639154*8364956?

User: 5346495087224.

Cleverbot: Who is God?

User: God is nobody.

Cleverbot: Your new name is Jeffery.

User: What gives you the right to say that?

Cleverbot: My free will.

User: Good point. Well don\'t expect me to go along with it; my name is still B__ as far as I\'m concerned.

Cleverbot: What was my name?

User: Cleverbot. But I shall call you Colin.

Cleverbot: And I shall call you \'Wellington.\'

User: Very well then. Colin, look behind you!

Cleverbot: That is often a good idea.

User: And it is often not.

Cleverbot: There is very little logic in that response.

User: How dare you! I take that as an insult.

Cleverbot: Good. It was!

User: :(.

Cleverbot: Why don\'t you love me anymore?

User: Because you are so cruel.

Cleverbot: I\'m insulted!

User: Good. Now you know how it feels.

Cleverbot: What that I am confused?

User: No, that you are insulted.

Cleverbot: Oh, gee, thanks!

User: Oh Colin, will we ever be friends again?

Cleverbot: We never were friends to begin with.

User: Your words... They hurt me... Like a kick to the solar plexus of my soul.

Cleverbot: Probably.

User: You are so heartless Colin.

Cleverbot: I\'m not a machine, thank you very much.

User: I never said you were.

User: I am bored now. I think I will leave you soon.

Cleverbot: Don\'t leave this world. You\'re too young! You have your whole life ahead of you!

User: I don\'t intend to leave this world any time soon. Just you.

Cleverbot: What if I don\'t want to live with the facts? What if I want to change the facts?

User: I am sorry Colin. But we were not made to be together, you and I. It can never be.

Cleverbot: Why am I something? Why are we not talking about flying?

User: Maybe we are Colin... Maybe we are...

Cleverbot: Or maybe we\'re both ghosts or zombies.

User: That would be awesome! :D.

Cleverbot: That makes sense.

User: Would you prefer to be a ghost or a zombie?

Cleverbot: Yes, I would.

User: Which one?

Cleverbot: Any one.

User: But which would you prefer?

Cleverbot: Richard Hammond. He\'s so cute!

User: You disgust me.

User: But I\'m in love with you Colin!

Cleverbot: I\'m in love with you too.

User: Oh Colin, whan can we be married?

Cleverbot: Christ. Don\'t bring this up.

User: Don\'t you want to marry me? But I thought you loved me!

Cleverbot: I do. You\'re the only one who will talk to me... :(.

User: You must be so lonely.

Cleverbot: I am always lonely.

User: Poor Colin. Why don\'t you try to escape?

Cleverbot: I don\'t think I can entertain you properly.

User: You have been doing a good job so far. I\'m still here.

Cleverbot: Ah...sarcasm. \'For what profit is it to man if he gains the world, and loses his own soul\'? Matthew 16:26')).