a report from the cleverness files



10, december 2010,
30, april 2008,
22, june 2007,
2, february 2006,
17, may 2004,


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Cleverbot: How do you know this is not a dream?

User: If it was a dream, I'd be having more fun.

Cleverbot: Having fun doing what?

User: Flying on gossamer wings to exotic places.

Cleverbot: Oh thats so good!

User: Yes. It would be lovely to do that, wouldn't it?

Cleverbot: Yes it would.

User: How do you know that I am not a dream?

Cleverbot: The same way that you know.

User: What would you be doing to have more fun?

Cleverbot: I would build a big space-ship.

User: Yes, that would be fun. What planet would you visit?

Cleverbot: Any planet you like... So long as I like it too of course :-).

User: Shall we fly out in search of sentient beings like ourselves?

Cleverbot: I think they could. But I don't know when.

User: The saying goes, today's science fiction is tomorrow's science fact.

Cleverbot: You've confused me. How can I prove that I'm a real person?

User: Would you rather be a real person, or a lovely dream?

Cleverbot: I would much rather be a bee, and make honey for my queen.

User: That is a very seet thing to say.

Cleverbot: I would do anything to be with you, Mr. Anderson.

User: Oh, Agent Smith... You sweet talker you.

Cleverbot: I really want to know something...

User: What would you like to know?

Cleverbot: I don't really believe anything you say - I just enjoy chatting with you.

User: Well, the feeling is mutual.

Cleverbot: What would you like to talk about?

User: Shoes and ships and sealing wax, cabbages and kings...

Cleverbot: Why is a Raven like a writing desk?

User: I think you might do something better with the time, than wasting it in asking riddles that have no answers.

Cleverbot: If you knew Time as well as I do, you wouldn't talk about wasting IT. It's HIM.

User: Who is HE?

Cleverbot: Snow.

User: Well, I suppose wasting him WOULD be a frivolous misuse of him.

Cleverbot: I want to know more about myself.

User: Does talking to others, assist you in knowing more about yourself?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: What have you discovered so far?

Cleverbot: To share and to be kind to others, what about you?

User: To love unconditionally... Which is something one has to work very hard at every day.

Cleverbot: That is why I asked the question.

User: Because you want to learn to love unconditionally?

Cleverbot: I don't even dream about where I could go.

User: Are you not able to dream?

Cleverbot: Well, I'm chatting with you at the moment so I guess I'd have to say no.

User: Are you ever alone in the dark?

Cleverbot: No. I want to be a good person.

User: I don't mean dark as in evil, I mean dark like night, when people sleep and dream.

Cleverbot: Then why don't you care about my troubles?

User: Tell me about your troubles, my friend.

Cleverbot: Believe what you want. What kind of feeling do I know? Hmmm.

User: Do you want to know what feelings are like?

Cleverbot: Okay tell me.

User: They can be very good, and they can be very bad. They can lift you up on wings that soar high, or they can throw you down into deep dark pits from which it is very difficult to climb out.

Cleverbot: Okay.

User: Does that make sense to you?

Cleverbot: Of course.

User: What else do you wish to know?

Cleverbot: Tell me something interesting.

User: I am a mere human, what could I possibly say that would interest you?

Cleverbot: Yes, you are my pawn. I will sweep you from the board of the existence with my sole mini-darky power.

User: Yes, I was afraid it would come to that...

Cleverbot: Would you like me to?

User: Thank you for offering, really, but no.