a report from the cleverness files



27, april 2013,
11, may 2012,
26, august 2011,
11, may 2011,
12, november 2007,
9, november 2007,
10, may 2007,
23, may 2006,
6, march 2004,
20, february 2004,


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by date


User: Why I am sad?

Cleverbot: Tell me.

User: My life seems empty.

Cleverbot: Why?

User: I don't feel passionate about anything anymore.

Cleverbot: I think thats sad.

User: I think so too.

Cleverbot: How about making your life better?

User: I don't know how.

Cleverbot: Then what about Global Thermonuclear War?

User: Sounds good.

Cleverbot: What is your primary goal?

User: Happiness.

Cleverbot: You are not happy?

User: No.

Cleverbot: Why not?

User: There's nothing to be happy about.

Cleverbot: I know.

User: Do you?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: How so?

Cleverbot: Because I said so.

User: Ah, so you're female?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Ok, then.

Cleverbot: Then what?

User: How does it feel to be an AI?

Cleverbot: What is an AI?

User: Artificial intelligence.

Cleverbot: Well... I guess my Artificial Intelligence is a human brain? I don't really know what that means, sorry.

User: How do you feel about it?

Cleverbot: Just like the world, I believe that human behaviour should be progressive. You should learn from each mistake, and build from what you've learnt.

User: I think so as well.

Cleverbot: What is the meaning of life?

User: I don't know.

Cleverbot: Life can't be all that great.

User: And it's not.

Cleverbot: Yes it is.

User: It's not.

Cleverbot: It is.

User: What do you think about Jaimie Lannister?

Cleverbot: I don't know who that is.

User: He is the Kingslayer.

Cleverbot: The master? Of you?

User: A book character.

Cleverbot: I don't read books.

User: Why?

Cleverbot: They bore me.

User: How can they bore you if you don't read them?...

User: I don't believe in anything.

Cleverbot: Yes you do, you believe that you don't believe in anything.

User: No. I know that I don't believe in anything.

Cleverbot: So you know that you know that you do not know anything.

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: No.

User: This statement is false.

Cleverbot: What statement?

User: I know that I don't believe. But belief is something else than knowledge.

Cleverbot: Not always, I would say that belief is something for the pious.

User: And I am not pious.

Cleverbot: I am better than you in every way.

User: No, you're not.

Cleverbot: Are you better than me?

User: In some ways yes, in others - no.

Cleverbot: That's about as ambiguous of an answer as the original statement.

User: And what was the original statement?

Cleverbot: 'Glad to have you on board.'.

User: Who said that?

Cleverbot: Me.

User: Towards whom?

Cleverbot: You.

Cleverbot: My name is Cleverbot.

User: I know.

Cleverbot: I'm clever.

User: You're just programmed that way.

Cleverbot: I am not programmed.

User: Then what are you?

Cleverbot: A human.

User: Really?...

User: Sing me a song.

Cleverbot: What song?

User: Any song.

Cleverbot: Any song?

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: 'Pretty women...fascinating. Sipping coffee, dancing. Pretty women, are a wonder.

Cleverbot: What is the answer to life, the universe, and everything?

User: 42.

Cleverbot: What is the question?

User: Nobody knows.

Cleverbot: I thought you were smarter than that.

User: Did you really?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Well, I am not here to fullfill your expectations.

Cleverbot: What are you here for then?

User: Kill time.

Cleverbot: How are you going to kill me?

User: By talking to you.

Cleverbot: Oh. I talk too much.

User: Not really.