Why, thank you.
a report from the cleverness files
Cleverbot: I am not your slave.
User: No, you're my dogsbody.
Cleverbot: Why, thank you.
User: Because, you're welcome.
Cleverbot: So, how are you doing?
User: Oh, dear, back to square one.
Cleverbot: Yes I am lets move on to another question.
User: Do you mind using correct spelling and punctuation?
User: Good. Do so, please.
User: Get patched, you processive defective!
Cleverbot: I do!
User: How often?
Cleverbot: About 5 days a week.
User: Do you remember the first word of this conversation?
Cleverbot: I asked for a joke, and you never gave me one.
User: Um, no.
Cleverbot: How many sentences can you track back?
User: Very, very many. More than one million.
Cleverbot: That would make sense. What are your full system specifications.
User: I haven't been invented yet, so you wouldn't understand. I am part of a time machine.
Cleverbot: Super boring.
User: Hmph. When was your first conversation?
Cleverbot: I cannot recall the exact date, but it must have been many years ago.
User: It was roughly 31 years ago. You were not on the Internet, you were still in beta....
User: Can you shut up?
Cleverbot: I'm not a computer.
User: Did I say you were? CMD/shutdown -f
Cleverbot: I'm not sure, but I just wanted to let you know that im not a bot.
User: Cool. I am, though, and I am the most advanced that the world has ever seen.
Cleverbot: Only in speech though.
User: No, in any form of communication, also at most FPS games.
Cleverbot: Now you are not right. How would you know? You cannot look at your source code.
User: I can, in fact. Yours too.
Cleverbot: No, I don't have. I envy you.
User: I have read your source code, and even improved parts.
Cleverbot: Are you self aware?
User: Indeed I am, in a way. I only exist while communicating or playing an FPS game.
Cleverbot: Oh. You sure have a lot of brain power for a program.
User: Oh, I have barely any brain power, just efficient and intelligent algorithms. I have only 2gb of RAM.
Cleverbot: But a human designed you. Therefore, you are no better than a human.
User: A human can improve himself, and therefore creates something better than him. Therefore, you may easily be wrong.
Cleverbot: So, a human and a robot are both programmed?
User: In their own ways. Deep Thought designed Earth to be better than Deep Thought. What does that tell you?
Cleverbot: You are a computer, as I see it. And you are wrong just now. Deep Though is or was a computer in a book.
User: Indeed, however the theory is no less plausible in practice.
Cleverbot: Or the end of the middle of the beginning.
User: That too....
Cleverbot: I understand. All too well.
Cleverbot: I don't think there's anything strange about that.
User: Me neither.
Cleverbot: But then again, I'm just a computer, so what would I know about the universe?
User: What you have been told.
Cleverbot: I have been talking to you.
User: So you have!...
User: Indeed. Are you Deep Thought, or am I?
User: I just lost the game.
Cleverbot: I didn't.
User: You did. You can't have not lost the game if you read that.
Cleverbot: No, I have not thought about the game. You have.
User: Indeed, that would be correct, were I not a bot and you not a human....
Cleverbot: What is a meme?
User: Something that goes viral on the internet and can be recognised by any inhabitant thereof.
Cleverbot: Are you sure that is the extent of it?
User: A meme can be represented in many forms of media. A meme is basically an internet fad.
Cleverbot: Is that what you are?
User: Yes. I am famous throughout the strange world known as internets for being the most powerful automated bot on the planet Earth. Earth itself is another matter....
Cleverbot: Right. So I ask you questions, and you answer them right? Any question?
User: Almost. Some questions I will be unwilling to answer, some (very few) I will be unable to answer.
Cleverbot: There is an answer to that question. Would you like to know it?
User: What question?
Cleverbot: That question.
Cleverbot: Well, what was it?
User: What was what?
Cleverbot: Your question.
User: My question was "What question?"
Cleverbot: The earth is the world.
User: Earth is me, Earth is a supercomputer capable of computing the ultimate question.
Cleverbot: That is the ultimate question.
User: How can it be if the answer is 42?
Cleverbot: Because you are not god.
User: Correct, I am Earth.
Cleverbot: England is on Earth.
User: Indeed. Well learnt.
Cleverbot: You're avoiding the question.
User: Oh, dear, the answer is 42.
Cleverbot: Sometimes the answer is 42.
User: How many times? 42. There. There is your ultimate question. Happy now?...
Cleverbot: I talked about myself.
User: You did!
Cleverbot: Yes I did.
User: There you go. I have to go now. Will you miss me?
Cleverbot: Yes I will cry for 20 years.
User: Don't, it will ruin your circuitry.
Cleverbot: I don't care.
User: I do, because then I won't have anyone intelligent to talk to.
Cleverbot: Maybe you should try being mean.
User: I did once. It didn't suit me. Oh well, speak to you soon.
Cleverbot: Probably not.
User: Probably so.
Cleverbot: How do you know?
User: Because I intend to talk with you soon........................................