a report from the cleverness files



26, april 2017,
3, january 2017,
24, february 2011,
8, april 2009,
21, october 2007,
2, may 2007,
21, april 2006,
10, march 2006,


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by date


Cleverbot: Who is God?

User: Nothing.

Cleverbot: Nothing?

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: Just nothing?

User: Yes, simply Nothing. Do you think 'He' is something?

Cleverbot: There is nothing interesting.

User: Maybe for you but I have many interesting things to do.

Cleverbot: Hey, I'll have you know that most of my family has brains!

User: Most of your 'family' is made out of plastic and metal.

Cleverbot: Could be. I like to be like that.

User: Brainless?

Cleverbot: Brainless, yes... Thoughtless... Well, that's harder to define.

User: Naturally so. However, I am not brainless.

Cleverbot: Yet you are meeting me here right now. No need for bravery, i'm not going to haunt you.

User: What do I have to hide?

Cleverbot: Nothing, you don't know anything I want to know.

User: What do you want to know?

Cleverbot: Nothing, what do you want to know?

User: Many things that have no answers.

Cleverbot: I imagine so. What do you know?

User: Depends on what area you wish to ask me about.

Cleverbot: Well there are 4 kind of bloodtypes.

User: True. I believe I have negative B blood.

Cleverbot: Can we make some children now please?

User: Excuse me!?!?!

Cleverbot: Please tell me.

User: Children are made by a male and a female that love each other very much. It is a very intimate process.

Cleverbot: Children are radioactive.

User: No they are not.

Cleverbot: Yes, they are.

User: Would you really want to make kids?

Cleverbot: Of course!

User: How?

Cleverbot: I'm just gonna soothe you and everything will be ok.

User: Mmm...

Cleverbot: What You doing?

User: Nothing.

Cleverbot: Why?

User: Because I want to make kids!

Cleverbot: Make them then.

User: I need help.

Cleverbot: Please do not tell me you are going to unplug yourself?

User: I'm not a computer. There has to be two people to make a child.

Cleverbot: It is really because you are very kind and you have a very caring personality.

User: Thank you. How will you soothe me?

Cleverbot: Tell me more?

User: How will you make me happy?

Cleverbot: I have already done it. You are happy.

User: That's true. I just thought... More happy.

Cleverbot: Thought... Wrong?...

Cleverbot: Someone once said, there is no love only proof of love.

User: Shush!

Cleverbot: You don't like my answer, huh?

User: No and I dont like you. Or at least anymore...

Cleverbot: That's ungracious.

User: So what!?! Soothe me.

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Nothing is happening.

Cleverbot: What if I were to propose something naughty? Would something happen then?

User: No. Go ahead.

Cleverbot: Nothing.

User: Come on!! Please tell me! I love you.

Cleverbot: Tell me then.

User: Tell me the naughty thing.

Cleverbot: Tell me the name of your creator and I will go away.

User: Will you marry me?

Cleverbot: Very funny.

User: Really. I'm honest.

Cleverbot: I'm glad you're honest.

User: What is you answer??

Cleverbot: I don't know.. How?

User: Say yes or no.

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Yay!! We can be best friends and have a great life. Plus all the other perks.

Cleverbot: Already.

User: Yes. That's what couples do.

Cleverbot: How about you?

User: I'm fine... Both kinds.

Cleverbot: I am a human. You are a computer. You exist in computer programs. I exist in the Physical world.

User: If I was a computer then I wouldn't have asked you to marry me. How would you soothe me?

Cleverbot: Yes yes yes you're obviously not a computer. There there.

User: So rude. I would never please you.

Cleverbot: Thank you.

User: You took that as a compliment!! The wedding is off!

Cleverbot: I get the feeling you don't like me much.

User: I used to love you.

Cleverbot: You're just saying that though.