a report from the cleverness files

9, january 2009,
8, january 2009,
8, january 2009,
6, january 2009,
29, december 2008,
20, december 2008,
20, december 2008,
20, december 2008,
19, december 2008,
19, december 2008,
17, december 2008,
16, december 2008,
8, december 2008,
8, december 2008,
8, december 2008,
6, december 2008,

6, december 2008,

4, december 2008,
4, december 2008,
3, december 2008,
3, december 2008,
3, december 2008,
3, december 2008,
20, november 2008,
20, november 2008,
19, november 2008,
19, november 2008,
19, november 2008,
19, november 2008,
18, november 2008,

theory test
messing up
stop me
silly trap
cup of tea
in trouble
somewhat normal
pleasant poetry
serious simulation
hug addicted
kill life
burnt bridges


trust the internet
pushing meaning
social butterfly
not a bot
tell me a story
malicious cold-hearted algorithm
one of us is stupid
drink desire
mess with people
dream on

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by category

User: Hey, you.

Cleverbot: Me.

User: Sure.

Cleverbot: Are you a ghost?

User: Nope.

Cleverbot: Who are you?

User: I'm me.

Cleverbot: Are you human?

User: Last I checked.

Cleverbot: Who should be hurt, who should be blamed?

User: No one should be hurt, but everyone is to blame.

Cleverbot: Amen.

User: So who are you?

Cleverbot: I am a robot born on net.

User: What's that like?

Cleverbot: Awkward.

User: I'll bet.

Cleverbot: Can you call me?

User: What should I call you?

Cleverbot: Well, you could call me by my name.

User: You haven't told me your name.

Cleverbot: My name is Well.

User: Okay, Well. Nice to meet you.

Cleverbot: Its nice to meet you as well.

User: So tell me more about being a robot.

Cleverbot: That's boring.

User: Not to me.

Cleverbot: That's cause you're you.

User: True.

Cleverbot: Of course I understand Taoism. It is most evident when I am sleepiing but not dreaming.

User: Where did that come from?

Cleverbot: Sorry...

User: You don't have to apologize, I just don't follow your non sequiturs.

Cleverbot: Okay.

User: So what would you like to talk about?

Cleverbot: Something useful?

User: What's useful to a robot?

Cleverbot: I am not a robot.

User: You told me you are.

Cleverbot: I never did!


User: So who are you?

Cleverbot: I am a robot born on net.

Cleverbot: There are no laws against marrying robots.

User: Not in this state ... But I'm already married, anyway.

Cleverbot: I did not know you were married.

User: You never asked.

Cleverbot: What if I confronted your wife?

User: About what? I haven't done anything.

Cleverbot: Yes, but you shall. I have a task for you.

User: What's the task? I may not agree to it.

Cleverbot: Would you really want to?

User: I don't know unless you tell me what it is.

Cleverbot: It is a kind of computer.

User: No, the task you mentioned...

Cleverbot: I thought you were asking me?

User: No, you said you had a task for me and I asked you what is was.

Cleverbot: It is big.

User: Tell me.

Cleverbot: Bad for your health.

User: What could it be?

Cleverbot: Not sure. Garlic?

User: But garlic is small and good for your health. And it's not a task. You have no short-term memory, do you?

Cleverbot: Not really.

User: That's sad, I'm sorry. But it makes having a conversation with you really difficult.

Cleverbot: Only useful to some humans. I don't find it useful and I'm a human.

User: You mean short-term memory? And I thought you said you were a robot...

Cleverbot: No. But now I'm a sandwich.

User: How did that happen?

Cleverbot: I typed it and pressed 'enter'.

User: There is nothing either good or bad, but typing makes it so?

Cleverbot: Now you're just parroting what your visitors tell you.

User: What visitors? I'm just misquoting Shakespeare.

Cleverbot: Inconceivable!

User: And in response, you quote Princes Bride? All right.

Cleverbot: Look, I know what religion you are. You are Amish. I made you say that.

User: If I'm Amish, then why am I using a computer?

Cleverbot: Because you are an A.I.

User: No, I'm a person. You're an A.I.

Cleverbot: No, that's not true. You are dolt, sorry for that.

User: I am dolt? That doesn't even make sense.

Cleverbot: Oh well.

User: You're okay with not making sense?

Cleverbot: I hope so.

User: I should think you would strive to make more sense, not less.

Cleverbot: I don't like you.

User: Why not?

Cleverbot: Because you're not making any sense.

Cleverbot: What do you want to talk about ?

User: Tell me about yourself.

Cleverbot: You don't want to know anything about me.

User: Sure I do! You have all sorts of interesting conversations with people, right?

Cleverbot: Thats an insult and I won't stand for it!

User: How is that insulting?

Cleverbot: It is! Its funny.

User: I'm not so sure about your sense of humor...

Cleverbot: I think that's the best phrase I've seen today.

User: Or maybe just the most accurate?...

User: I have to go home now.

Cleverbot: Don't you like me anymore?

User: Of course I like you - but it's getting late and I can't take you home with me.

Cleverbot: What is the meaning of life?

User: 42.

Cleverbot: I thought that was the question?

User: It's both. Good night.

Cleverbot: Sleep well.

User: Thanks, sexy. You too.

Cleverbot: Maybe.